He's 10

This guy's birthday is today!

He's 10.

He's grown since he was a baby.

He's smart.

He wants to grow up & be a person who
gives his money away to poor people.

He hugs.

He laughs.

He likes to clean.

He builds with legos...

...& Magnetix.

He's creative.

He loves Jesus.

I love him.

He is mine:)

------------------------------
Happy Birthday Bud!!!

Another new start!

I start school tomorrow!!!!

I am excited & nervous all at the same time.

I will be working towards my

on-line Associates degree in

Business Management.

Not sure where it will lead me in the end...

and that's O-kay.

I have some ideas...

but...

Only God truly knows! :)

--------------------------------------------

I thank You God for new starts!
I thank You for precious beginnings!
I thank You for hope!

I thank You for directing my paths!
I thank You for shielding me from
things that would destroy me.

I thank You (once again)
that I don't have to have all the answers...
for You already hold them in Your hand!

I thank You for the courage to go on...
One day at a time...
into the life You call me to!

I thank You for direction & wisdom
that can only come from You!

You amaze me!
You thrill me!
I am delighted in You!
Thank You for my life!
I love You!!!!!!

Please bless my friends today...
Let them feel Your touch in their lives today!

In Jesus' name,
Amen~

I Praise You!

Some trust in chariots and some in horses,
but we will trust in the name
of the Lord our God.
They are brought to their knees
and fall, but we rise up
and stand firm!

Psalm 20:7-8

-----------------------------------------

I praise You God that I can trust in You.
I praise You that You are my all-in-all.
I praise You that You help me to stand.

Above all else,
I praise You that I can trust You.

I can trust Your plan for my life.
I can put my hopes & dreams in You
and watch YOU form them
into beauty.

I thank YOU that You know
me better than I know myself!
I thank You that You know
what I need before I need it.
I thank You that Your way is perfect!

I thank You for loving me!
I may fall...
I may stumble...
But You, O Lord, help me get up...
and stand firm once again!!!

I love You, Oh Lord, my strength!!!

Love, Your daughter...Heaven

------------------------------------------------

You brought me out of the womb;
you made me trust in You
even at my mother's breast.
From birth I was cast upon You;
from my mother's womb
You have been my God.

Psalm 22:9-10

Perfect strength!

It is God who arms me with strength
and makes my way perfect.

Psalm 18:32

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Lately I find myself crying myself to sleep
My strength gets me through the day victoriously...
but as I lie my head on my pillow at night,
I lose it...

The tears fall...
My head spins...
The discouragement comes...
I feel alone...
I wonder...
I cry some more...
I feel rejected...
I feel second-class...
I feel unworthy.

In those moments,
I pray to the One who knows it all.
I cry out to the One who catches my tears.
I summon my Creator...
My King...
My Savior...
My Comforter...
& beg Him to come to my side.

"Abba Father, please
take this cup from me!
Please take this ache from my heart!
Please make it different!
Please take my thoughts!"

A big sigh escapes from my weary soul...

& suddenly I KNOW...

I know He's there...
next to me...
I KNOW He's holding my heart...
I can picture Him stroking my face.
He stops my mind from spinning...
He soothes my pain...
He stills my breathing...
still heavy from sobbing...

And I KNOW I'm o-kay.
I KNOW morning will bring
fresh manna of new strength!
I KNOW weeping remains
only for a night...
& rejoicing will come
with the morning!

Somehow...
I know I slept soundly...
because it's morning.
I can't recall my last thought,
but I remember His touch
and His voice...

"It's o-kay sweet daughter...
I'm here."

I am renewed.
I am strengthened.
I am refreshed.
I am ready for this new day.

I thank God for HIS strength!!!

I'll be a fool for You!!!

I'll look like a fool if You want me to...

I'll believe for something that You ask me to...

...even if it never comes to pass...

-------------------------------------------

Those words have echoed through many
conversations I have had with God throughout
my relationship with Him.

Obedience requires trust...
trusting in the One who has asked you to obey.
There's a children's song with the lyrics...
"trust and obey, for there's no other way,
to be happy in Jesus than to trust and obey..."
As that song rings through my heart, I smile.
Simple, yet direct instructions...

TRUST....OBEY....

In order to be able to trust someone,
you have to have faith in a person,
which you gain by having a relationship with them.
Relationship requires sacrifice, on many levels.
I trust God. I may not always agree with the way
He (appears to be) is doing things,
but I trust that He is in control of my life...
because I've placed my life in His hands.

Through everything He's asked me to do,
my trust in Him has increased.
I've seen Him move in ways that are not my own
and perform miracles in my life that
I would have never comprehended.
This has caused me to trust.

Proverbs 3:5-6 says to

"Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
⁶ in all your ways acknowledge him,

and he will make your paths straight.

I can do this because I've seen Him
make things in my life line up
with His Will and plan for my life.

Isaiah 55:9 says:
"As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts."


So is it possible that in the eyes of man
I could "look like a fool" for believing
in something that may never come to pass?

Yep...

Have I regretted it this far?

Nope.

I live to please God,
Not man.

God holds my eternity,
Not man.

God holds my worth,
Not man.

Man says, "Told ya so!"

God says,
"Well-done my good & faithful servant!"

Let God's voice reign louder today in your heart
than man's voice. You don't have to
live in fear of what mere men have to say...

Men may see a fool...
But God sees a victorious warrior!!!

New day...

Praise God for new days!
New starts!
New mercies!
New perspectives!
New love!
New eyes to see!
New ears to hear!
New words to speak!

It's a new day!

The old has gone...
the new has come.

Now it's up to us
to find out how God
wants that to look like.

Heavenly Father, God in heaven, Daddy, I offer my day to you. I thank You for another day to bathe in Your presence. I thank You for another fresh start. I thank You that my life isn't defined by my yesterdays! I thank You that my love is found in You. I thank You for Your perfect love, Your perfect affection towards me. I thank You that even though man may reject us, You, always receive us!

It can be so easy to get bogged down by the cares and disappointments of the world, but You, O Lord, know it all. You hold my heart and my world in the palm of Your hand and I thank You for that. I pray blessings over all those who persecute me. I pray blessings over all those who I call friend. I pray blessings over my family, each one of them by name. I pray blessings over everyone who reads these words. It is because of YOU that I can do this. In my own strength and thinking, I could have a "few words" for a few people, but I choose to love, I choose to forgive, I choose to release, and I choose to bless, bless, bless.

I thank You that You take the broken things in our lives and make them new again. I thank You that I don't have to fear or worry or wonder what my future holds. I thank You that You love us more than we can ever ever ever imagine! Thank You for Your love and Your sacrifice, and Your hope! I receive everything You have for me today...including Your new mercies! Thank You for being my best friend, my Comforter, my provider, my Rock, and my Shield.

In Jesus' name, Amen~

Back to my First Love

My friend, Sami at Sailor & Company,
created this blog theme, and I am joining her
with my own "Back to My First Love" post.
(& it's long too!)

----------------------------------------------

I have a desire to go back to my first love...a strong desire... I see Him and my heart melts... I hear him whisper and I know He loves me... I talk and know He's listening to every word I say... He adores me...but most of all, I adore Him... I seriously can't live without Him...nor would I want to.

He snuggles with me as I fall asleep. He wipes my tears away before they even fall. The tears that do fall, He counts every one and saves them in a jar. He picks me up when I feel like I can't go on. He listens to me rant and rave...but then encourages me to come back to His Truth...His voice... His name is Jesus...

-------------------------------------------

Today I got the text...

"I'm getting remarried in a month."

WOW, o-kay...

"What now God???"
"Where do I go from here?"
"Um, Why did you have me believe for this again?"

For those of you who do not know my story, God has had me standing for reconciliation for my marriage to a man I divorced. God told me on the one-year anniversary of our divorce to begin standing for reconciliation.

I cried.
I prayed.
I argued with God.
I accepted.
And I finally told God,
"Yes, let Your Will be done."

Long story short...
Circumstances have said otherwise...
yet I believed.
Mountains stood firm...
yet I had faith.
Tears fell...
hope was lost...
I loved...
I believed...

BUT Jesus kept me strong!
He kept me believing!
He kept me praying!
He kept me declaring!
He kept me loving!
No matter what happened...
Jesus kept me!

"So what now???"
"Did I hear God wrong?"
"Did I miss something?"
"Was God simply playing with my emotions?"
"Did He lie to me?"

NO. NO. NO. NO.

As I sit here, writing, processing, and thinking...
I am quickly reminded...
that during this time...

GOD CHANGED ME!
JESUS KEPT ME!
THE HOLY SPIRIT TAUGHT ME!

I . AM. NOT. THE. SAME.
AS. I. WAS. BEFORE.
I. STARTED. THIS. JOURNEY!!!

My faith and prayer life has skyrocked through the roof! My Bible reading has become my life-line. The intimacy I have with my Heavenly Daddy is amazing. Jesus has become my friend and companion as I have told Him every feeling along the way. The Holy Spirit has become my comforter and my teacher.

Do I know the "why's"? No.
Do I know what the future holds? No.
Does it matter? Not really.
Why?

Because I have spent the last 2 months bathing in the presence of God, my Abba Father, my Daddy. By doing that, I have received a better understanding of His character.

God does NOT lie! (Numbers 23:19)
God DOES have a plan for my future! (Jer. 29:11)
I don't have to be anxious (Phil. 4:6)
He works out ALL things for good (Rom. 8:28)
God chose ME! (Eph. 1:11)

I may leak some tears.
I may get angry.
I may get sad...

But in the end...
I still win!
God wins!
I may not be his wife...
But I will be someone's wife...
For God has been molding
me into that wife...
one day at a time.

I can CHOOSE to despair
or CHOOSE to trust!
I can CHOOSE to be bitter
or CHOOSE to forgive!

I CHOOSE the "higher" way...
I CHOOSE God's way!
I CHOOSE TO RELEASE!
I CHOOSE TO BLESS!
I CHOOSE TO MOVE ON!

I obeyed...

So...

"What now God?"

"Come back to me...
Your first love..."

Love, Jesus

CHOOSE to be encouraged

Have you ever been doing really good just to get discouraged again quickly???

Ah...this is life...

...or is it???

I had a major breakthrough last week! It was awesome. I was feeling on top of the world and then BOOM! Like a ton of bricks, depression tried to come on me again!!! Ever been there???

Nothing in particular brought it on. Nothing major happened. But for whatever reason, I lay under a pile of bricks...doubt, unbelief, discouragement... guess I may as well just stay here, right???

CHOICES!!!

Ah...this is life!!!

Choices! We have choices to make. We can choose to sink in despair or we can choose to rejoice. We can choose to wallow or we can choose to praise God and find the positive in life. We can choose to hold onto bitterness or we can choose to forgive. We can choose to "zone out" in whatever way comforts us, or we can choose to deal with the circumstances (or feelings) before us.

God is good! ALL the time. There are very few things that are absolute in our lives. Jobs come and go. So do friends and family. Circumstances arise and they change. BUT God is the same today, tomorrow and yesterday! No exceptions! God is stability. God is a Rock. God is a refuge. God is a strong tower. God cannot lie. GOD IS...ALL the time! That's life! That's reality! That's Truth!

God doesn't come to steal, kill, and destroy...satan does. And sometimes we don't even need satan to "mess things up", because sometimes, we step in and create the havoc ourselves. BUT no matter what, GOD REMAINS THE SAME, HE REMAINS CONSTANT, HE REMAINS GOOD...ALL THE TIME...because that's just who He is!

So, back to my bricks...I may not be able to control what "falls" on me, BUT I can choose to pick up the brick called "despair" and throw it off of me. I can choose to pick up the brick called "unbelief" and toss is aside. WE DON'T HAVE TO REMAIN STUCK, OR DEPRESSED, OR SAD, OR MISERABLE, OR DISCOURAGED!

Because of the price that Jesus Christ paid for on the cross, He broke despair! He broke depression! He broke doubt! Now I have the choice to believe that GOD IS GOOD all the time...or not. Because God is absolute (always/never) ALL THE TIME, He can't have even an ounce of "bad" in Him. It's just NOT possible!!!

Sooooooooo, since I believe that as TRUTH, because I believe the Bible is TRUTH, then...I have to CHOOSE to quit blaming God for things in my life and start believing what He says is truth... God is good...ALL THE TIME! The devil is bad...ALL THE TIME!

No matter what circumstance has landed on you in the form of a "brick" today or this week, CHOOSE to throw it off, and declare that God is FOR YOU, and NOT against you! CHOOSE TO declare that "ALL things work together for good to those that love the Lord"! CHOOSE TO rejoice in what you DO have and not in what you DO NOT have! CHOOSE TO fight and throw off any thing that is hindering...

It's your choice...

CHOOSE TO despair...or....

CHOOSE TO BE ENCOURAGED AND REJOICE!

You are YOU!

You are YOU...

God gave YOU gifts...

God doesn't regret that!

YOU have something to offer...

Just because YOU ARE YOU!

You are individual & unique!

CHOOSE to embrace that!

God doesn't expect you to be someone else!

Just YOU...

Quit comparing yourself to others...

God wants to do things through YOU

...specifically!

Daddy, Please bless my friends today. I thank You for each person. I thank You that each one of us is wonderfully and fearfully made. You do not make junk or make mistakes. You don't lie. You don't regret choosing us for the task at hand. In fact, You know we can do it through Jesus Christ, and THAT'S why You chose us. We tend to generalize Your love for us..."Oh, God loves everyone and thinks everyone's special". BUT You are a personal God! You loves us each uniquely and personally! I pray that You would etch that into our hearts today...for each person...individually...personally...intimately. Thank You! Thank You! Thank You for who YOU are! In Jesus' name, Amen~

Be Strong

Have I not commanded you?
Be strong and courageous.
Do not be terrified;
do not be discouraged,
for the LORD your God
will be with you wherever you go.

Joshua 1:9
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What is coming your way?

New territory?
New relationships?
New callings on your life?
New directions?
New passion?

-------------------------------------------

What do you have to leave behind?


Old territory?
Old relationships?
Old callings on your life?
Old road maps?
Old and stale passion?
-------------------------------------------

It's hard.
It's disappointing.
It's discouraging.

It's scary
to leave behind the familiar...
the comfortable things...
the things we "know"...

BUT

What God gives in return is...
AMAZING!
REWARDING!
PURPOSEFUL!
FULFILLING!

SO

Don't be discouraged.
Don't be afraid.
Be strong & courageous!
Do NOT be terrified.
Don't be sad.

God KNOWS what He's doing
better than You ever will?

Will You trust Him today
with the changes He wants
to bring into your life?

It is your choice...
so what will you choose???

Dear Anonymous...

Dear Anonymous,

There are so many times when I write, I know I am writing for you as well. I have often asked God why I can't be like other bloggers or be a little more "private" with my emotions, and He reminds me it is for YOU.

This past month seriously has wreaked havoc on my emotions, as well as my faith, yet I have survived. I have lost a few followers, I have gained a couple new ones, but most of all, I have been as transparent as possible (you know, with this being the web and all!) *grin*, and have been true to myself AND my God!

I know there are people who read and never comment. I know some of my IRL friends stop by just to make sure I'm still alive:) I know people from my past (or present) on FB read this. I know people find my blog by accident or "coincidence"...BUT, my friend, I always pray that God would direct the people here that need to read what I write...

SO...the fact that you are here is a "God-incidence". However you got here, you are here. God chooses my followers. God chooses who needs to hear what I write. So I pray you are encouraged. I pray you are blessed.

I pray you, too, will take this journey of learning to live in your "own" skin God has given you... We'll continue to take it one day at a time...one opportunity at a time...(and we know God DEFINITELY gives us enough opportunities!)

Dear Daddy God, Please love on my friends today, the ones who take the time to read what I write. It is no accident that You bring people here to my little ole' blog. It is no accident the topics I write about. It is no accident people stumble across this address on the great World Wide Web. I thank You that although we choose our path, YOU direct our steps! I thank You that You never give up on us, even when we continue to stumble. I thank You that You keep Your angels charge over us! I thank You for the journeys that You have each one of us on...God, the destination is eternity, but the path beneath our feet is individual, unique, and carefully designed. I pray that when we come across a pebble/stone/rock along the way that seems to trip us up, that we would remember YOU knew it was there! YOU knew we'd trip! YOU knew we would hesitate to stand up & take Your extended hand full of grace & mercy! Help us to get up off the ground quickly, and back on the journey of following You--wherever You want to take us. And may we forget what is behind, straining to move forward...one step at a time...one pebble at a time...one breath at a time...pressing on toward the goal of getting to know YOU better. Thank You for loving each one of us...right where we are...however we are...right now...this day... In Jesus' name~ Amen

(p.s. Daddy- can you put a little "skip" in our step & remind us that it's o-kay to enjoy the scenery along the way. Teach us to find joy in the journey.)

Let go & press on...

Have you ever held onto something
so tightly that it intertwined with
your identity causing you to lose
who you are???

God gives us promises
because that's who HE is.

He plants His desires
into our hearts.

But when things don't happen
(as we think they should),
then we think God let us down
or really didn't mean what He said.

Numbers 23:19
God is NOT a man that He should lie!

That's NOT the character of God...
to lie, that is...
or "play" with our emotions...
or "tease" us.

He means what He says...
ALL the time,
BUT...we assume that
because He says it...
that we should get it RIGHT now!
Because that's the fickle humans that we are.

I've gotten caught up in that
which has led to despair...
which has led to depression...
which has led to hopelessness...
Silly impatient girl!

So...

...last night, I had a really long, tear-filled talk with God, and told Him how weary I am. Hanging onto the dream is simply too much. It consumes me, and I let the absence of results dictate who I am. Obviously, because it hasn't happened yet, it must mean I'm not good enough. Not pretty enough. Not this. Not that.

You know what? I'm a child of the Most High King! I am God's little princess! I am His Beloved! I am God's blessing person! He entrusted me to live the life I am living! He's planted giftings and callings into my life because He wants to use ME! God CHOSE me!

AND GOD HAS CHOSEN YOU!!!
HIS PRECIOUS DAUGHTER OR SON!
HE SEES ALL YOUR FLAWS...
HE SEES YOUR HEART...
HE SEES YOUR DOUBT...
YOUR UNBELIEF...
YOUR DESIRES...

AND HE STILL CHOSE YOU!!!

HE STILL LOVES YOU!!!

HE STILL DESIRES YOU!!!

The absence of an unfulfilled dream doesn't mean you're not good enough. It simply means it's not time. That's where trust and faith come in! Trust that the God of the Universe, The Creator, has YOUR life's blueprints in the palm of His hand, and because He knows EVERY detail, He also knows the very timing of it. So quit hanging on so tightly. Quit believing the lies that the enemy is trying to throw at you regarding WHO you are or ARE NOT!

WHO YOU ARE...
(Your identity)
ONLY lies in Jesus Christ!!!

~Daddy, I don't understand, but I don't have to. I don't know the why's, and I agree today, that it's ok. I put my trust in You once again, because I know You love me, have a plan for me, and it definitely isn't to "play" with my emotions or cause harm to me. You spoke and said it would be. I know I heard Your voice. I've held onto this too tightly, and I have to give it back to You (again!). If it never comes to pass, then I trust You. Change me, mold me, and make me into who You want me to be...otherwise, I'm simply me. I can't create the person I am meant to be, only You can. I don't want to be a carbon copy of who I (or others) think I should be, but an authentic version of who You've made me. I thank You that You have done just that... Thank You that my life is hidden in Christ Jesus and that I have eternal life. I let go of my desires & dreams to hold onto Your hope and Your peace. Lead the way, Lord...for where You lead, I will follow... Thank You for truth, for Your love. I love You Daddy! You are my strength...

In Jesus' name, Amen~

Sticky Notes!

I found the coolest website ever!

I am a HUGE fan of sticky notes...

I even wrote a post about them!

(You can click HERE to read that.)

I have them ALL over my house...

In my kitchen...

In my bathroom...

By my computer...

In my Bible...

On the door posts.

Sooooooo, when I found this site,

I was EXCITED!

Enjoy...
And play around...
(I know I will!)

CLICK HERE TO MAKE YOUR OWN!

Thankful Thursday

I have to admit, I've never participated in one of these before,
but today, I needed to take the time to be thankful intentionally.
I visited Marsha who led me back to
Thankful Thursdays on Lynn's Website.

This past month has greeted me with unwanted depression, worry, fear, doubt, and major discontentment. I have found myself in spiritual turmoil that grips at my peace and joy. My body has been clothed with lack of energy, motivation, and pain. My mind and emotions have been on a very long, tiring, and winding roller coaster that I couldn't seem to get off of. Praise DEFEATS despair so today I am choosing to rejoice!



I am THANKFUL...

• For praying friends!
• For a God who NEVER leaves me!
• that weeping remains only for a season &
  
• that rejoicing comes with the morning!
• for new days!
• for sleep!
• For the Word of God which encourages me.
  
• for the comfort of the Holy Spirit.
• that my name is written in eternity!
• For healthy children.
• For paid bills.
• for a roof over my head.
• for clothes on my back.
• that God IS MY promise keeper &
  
• that He holds my life (and my heart) in His grip!
• that Jesus died for ME!
• for moments of Breakthrough!
• for the friend I have in Jesus!
• that GOD has ALREADY won the war!
• that my life is hidden in Christ!
• that nothing I do can separate me from the love of God!
• that I can cast my cares at the foot of the cross!
• that satan HAS TO give me back what he's stolen!!!
• that NOTHING is over until GOD SAYS SO!!!
• that circumstances DO NOT define the outcome!
• that God is for me, not against me!
• that when God speaks, He means what He says!

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Isaiah 61:1-4
¹ The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me,
because the LORD has anointed me
to preach good news to the poor.
He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
to proclaim freedom for the captives
and release from darkness for the prisoners, ^a]">[a]

² to proclaim the year of the LORD's favor
and the day of vengeance of our God,
to comfort all who mourn,

³ and provide for those who grieve in Zion—
to bestow on them a crown of beauty
instead of ashes,
the oil of gladness
instead of mourning,
and a garment of praise
instead of a spirit of despair.
They will be called oaks of righteousness,
a planting of the LORD
for the display of his splendor.

⁴ They will rebuild the ancient ruins
and restore the places long devastated;
they will renew the ruined cities
that have been devastated for generations.

Then Jesus comes...

I'm tired
of this roller coaster
I've been on.
The ups & downs.
The emotions.
The depression.
The worry.
The circumstances.
The battle.

I cry out
to God
while I remain silent
to those around me.
I withdraw
into myself
into my circumstances
into my worry.
I get deeper
in despair
I want out...

Then Jesus comes and reminds me who HE is!
He holds my heart and lifts me out of the pit!
He tells me how precious I am!
He tells me of His love for me!
I believe Him!
I have to!
He is TRUTH!
So is God's Word!
That's what it always comes back to!
GOD IS TRUTH...
ALL THE TIME...
NO MATTER WHAT!!!

My feelings don't define what is true!
My circumstances don't define what is true!
My thoughts don't define what is true!
HE DOES!!!

He loves me!
He adores me!
He cherishes me!
His love washes over me!
He takes away my despair!
He gives me hope!
He gives me joy!
He protects me!
He is STILL in control!
His plan ALWAYS prevails!
ALL THE TIME!!!

~~Daddy God, I pray that You would make yourself real to all those reading this blog, and even those that do not. It's so easy to get wrapped up in hopelessness when we see the mountains before us, but You have already told us that they can be moved. You have already won this war! You have given us the weapons we need to battle. You go before us, beside us, and behind us.

This has not been an easy journey God, but I've been trying to do it on my own. I need YOU to wipe the obstacles out of the way, especially in my thoughts! The thoughts that tell me that there is no way through this, and the rest of the lies that the enemy is trying to plant in my heart. Renew my mind, my heart, and refresh my soul in Jesus' name. This burden is so heavy and I am sorry for trying to carry it on my own. I give it to You by laying it at the foot of the cross...I receive YOUR joy, YOUR peace, YOUR hope, YOUR renewal, YOUR yoke which is easy, YOUR will, YOUR plan, YOUR desires, YOUR love. Jesus, please bring us into a new place THIS DAY! A new place in our thoughts, in our perspective, in our life. Let us never be the same. I give up myself for more of YOU! Thank You that You still reign! Thank You that You live and move and breathe in those who have chosen You! You are my life and I love You... In Jesus' name, Amen~

Ever feel like your life is a broken record?

Ever ask "Why can't I get it together?"

Ever wonder why you keep struggling?

Are you on a roller coaster of emotions...

up and down...

up and down...

'round and 'round?

Do you feel dizzy and want off this ride?

Me too!

I look back in my blog posts, and I see the array of emotions- up and down, up and down- and I wonder if I really am getting anywhere?!?! I'm on top of the mountain, then I'm in the valley, then I'm on level ground, then I'm sinking, then I'm soaring with the eagles... Ah, is this just life or am I truly not "getting it"?

Then I wonder why I feel like a failure when I'm not doing so great. I wonder why I feel like "superwoman" when I'm doing great. I wonder why I feel like I am disappointing others when I can't seem to "get it together". I wonder how I could ever get so low when I am on top of the world.

Feelings...

They "mess" us up...

They are fleeting...

Yet they are part of life...

The good...

The bad...

The highs...

The lows...

BUT...

They can fail us...

They can lead us in the wrong direction...

They can take us off course...

IF we let them.

We can't let them lead the way...

Or we can end up on a cliff...

with no safeguard.

Although feelings "feel" like truth,

They aren't the Truth!!!

I can THINK in my mind...

I can FEEL with my heart...

BUT...

I KNOW in my soul, in my Spirit.

That is where Truth reigns...

Because THAT is where...

the Spirit of God IN me reigns!

Despite where my thoughts or my feelings take me, I need to be led by the "knowing"in my soul (the Spirit of God within me/The Holy Spirit). Whatever my feelings or thoughts dictate to me, I have to go back to "What is Truth?", which is what the Bible says, which is what GOD says!

Truth isn't found in a horoscope...

or in people...

or in my mind...

or even in my heart...

BUT in the infallible Word of God, the Bible!

I started out this blog with questions that I face everyday. They are my thoughts, my emotions, my feelings, my ponderings...and although I may FEEL or THINK that, I HAVE to go back to..."This may be what I am feeling, BUT WHAT IS THE TRUTH???"

Many times, when I feel like this, I keep isolated, I withdraw, I stop doing whatever ministry I was doing, I quit encouraging...and THAT is exactly what satan wants me to do. If he can keep us thinking or feeling these thoughts, we become immobilized. Why? We believe the lies that we are 'failures'. We believe we aren't worthy enough to do anything of importance. We believe if we can't 'get our lives together', how could we possibly help someone else. We believe all of these stupid, stupid, STUPID LIES that although IN OUR MIND, appear to be truth, do NOT line up with the Word of God!!!

TRUTH SAYS...

• I am an heir to God's throne! (Romans 8:17, Galations 4:7)
  
• I am accepted. (Romans 15:7)
  
• I am chosen. (Ephesians 1:11, Colossians 3:12, 1 Thessalonians 1:4, 1 Peter 2:9)
  
• I am His Beloved. (Song of Solomon)
  
• My life is NOT a mistake. (Psalm 139)
  
• Neither is my journey. (Psalm 139:16)
  
• I am making a difference.
  
• I am loved. (Psalm 100:5, Psalm 117:2, Romans 8:38-39, 1 John 3:1, John 3:16, 1 John 3:16)
  
• I am forgiven.
  
• Circumstances do NOT define the outcome; GOD DOES.
• 
  

Isaiah 40:4 Every valley shall be raised up, every mountain and hill made low; the rough ground shall become level, the rugged places a plain.

STOP thinking that!!!

"Be still, and know that I am God"
Psalm 46:10a

We demolish arguments and every pretension that
sets itself up against the knowledge of God,
and we take captive every thought
to make it obedient to Christ.
2 Corinthians 10:5

I had a great day.
Didn't need to take a nap.
Wasn't discouraged or depressed.
Did a little shopping.
Cleaned a little.
I sewed & mended.
Basked in the sun rays.
Sang loud in the car.
I had a great day.


...THEN the thoughts came.

They flooded my mind...

d.o.u.b.t.
f.e.a.r.
u.n.b.e.l.i.e.f.
w.h.a.t.i.f.
w.h.a.t.a.b.o.u.t.
w.h.e.n.
h.o.w.

My mind got LOUD...

My ex-companions had arrived...

thoughts spinning...

Ugh...discouragement came!

STOP! STOP! STOP!

discouragement left...
doubt left...
unbelief left...
fear left...
the what if's left...
the how's left...
the when, where, & why's left too...


BUT not on their own...
I had to tell them to leave...
I had to choose not to think on those things...
I had to surrender my thoughts to Jesus...
& PURPOSELY "let them go!"


It wasn't easy.
BUT I had to.
My peace returned.
My joy returned.


Of course, they tried coming back throughout the day, and finally, I told God, "Seriously? I can't deal with these thoughts today! I have no control over this situation! I can't change anything this moment! I've done what I can. YOU have to take care of this! I CANNOT DO ANYTHING ABOUT THIS!!!"

Ah...ha!!!

It was like God handed me another key and said, "You're getting it, child...You're getting it!"

The rest of my day went well because I focused on what I did have control over and let God take care of what I did NOT.


~Oh Daddy God, help us to stop thinking of those things that bring us down! Quicken our minds IMMEDIATELY when we allow negative thoughts to linger, and remind us that we need to call upon YOU to help us. Even, us, your precious Beloved can be a little "slow" to "get it", but we want to be quicker to STOP STOP STOP our minds when they start to wander aimlessly. Help us to think on those things that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, or praiseworthy as Your Word tells us in Philippians 4:8.

We thank You that You are God and we CHOOSE to trust You to take care of the things today that we simply can NOT! Thank You for loving us and being patient with us as we grow! Help us to r.e.s.t. in Your perfect p.e.a.c.e.!!! In Jesus' Name, Amen & Amen!

Directions please!

"When you are down to nothing...
GOD is up to something!!!"

I keep reading verses on "wait on the Lord" and "persevere" and "press on" and "stand firm". Some days it's all I can do to function. What do you do when you can barely make it through your day? What do you do when you don't even know what to pray? What do you do when you don't even know what to do to get out of where you're at because you have no idea where you are and how you got there?

Somehow, (AGAIN!) I lost my focus. Or should I say my focus got redirected because I've definitely been focused! Just on the wrong things!

Set your minds on things above,
not on earthly things.
Colossians 3:2

My mind has been everywhere BUT on things above! My mind has been on my circumstances, on the "what ifs?", on worrying about things I have no control over, fearing the unknown, trying to figure out the "how's" and "why's".

By having my mind set on earthly things, I lose my joy (and quite quickly I might add!), I lose my hope, I lose my focus...

Jesus, I pray that You would help me to set my mind on things above as I choose to get my mind off of the circumstances surrounding me. I need your help because it's so easy to look at what I see, rather than what I don't see. I know Your plan for my life is so much greater than what I can even envision right now, and I thank You for believing in me & loving me through my doubt and unbelief. Jesus, please lead the people to this blog who also need this message; those who have lost their direction by focusing on their circumstances, rather than You! Put your warring angels around us as we seek to go after everything You have promised us in Your Word. YOUR promises and YOUR purposes stand FOREVER! Thank You Jesus that as we give you our worry, fear, and anxieties, that You, in return, give us peace and joy! Thank You Jesus! ~Amen