God knew what He was getting into!

When we compromise,
we always tend to feel "less than".

This morning, as I was spending some time worshiping, I came across this song by Misty Edwards. It says what I so often have felt when I feel like I have let God down.

We're human.
We make mistakes.
We sin.
We repent.
We feel worthless.
We sin.
We repent.

Eventually, we feel like we are close to "running out of grace". We wonder if we are ever going to "get it right".

Today, I want you to know that God is NOT disgusted with you. He's NOT disappointed with you. He's NOT sorry He's called you. He knew what He was getting into when He asked you to be His. This song speaks of the very same thing.

Close your eyes.
Listen to the words.
And let God speak to your heart.

Compromise

Com-pro-mise (kam'pre miz)- v. 1. to settle by a compromise. 2. to put in danger of being criticized or disgraced. 3. to expose or make vulnerable to danger, suspicion, scandal, etc. 4. To make a dishonorable or shameful concession.

Compromise...

There are certain things in life that would die or lose its flavor without compromise: friendships, marriages, parenting, work, and chores...

To compromise with the enemy, however, only leads to a toxic and sometimes, fatal outcome. Satan advances in as a wolf in sheep's clothing, finding in us our weakness. He digs out his conniving book of lies and begins the journey of deceiving us.

He shows us a copy of his rules, making us think, "Why did I ever think he was out to devour me? He's giving me more choices than God."

"You can go a little farther."
"Just one more time, and that's it."
"But if feels so good."
"This won't affect anyone but you."
"You can repent afterward."
"What's the big deal?"
"Everyone does it."
"It's just a little sin."
"God will forgive you."

We sign on the dotted line, but as the enemy turns to leave, the camouflaged ink begins to fade, only to reveal the fine print,

and
you
LOSE!

We give a little and he takes it all. That is not much of a compromise in my eyes.

Does he play fair? NO.

Does he try to deceive us with his wheeling and dealing, getting us to believe that he will keep his end of the bargain? Absolutely!

Sexual sin involves compromise... all of the time.

We compromise our purity.
We compromise our morals.
We compromise the Word of God.
We compromise our heart.
We compromise our peace.
We compromise our destiny.
We compromise our mind.
We compromise our victory.

In Matthew 4, Jesus was tempted three times by satan. On the third time, when satan offered Jesus all the kingdoms of the world if Jesus would only bow down and worship him.

Jesus did not passively say, "Oh, maybe you should go now."

Jesus, with authority and (most-likely) volume, declared, "AWAY FROM ME SATAN!"

Jesus declared His position and said, "Enough is enough! You have no place here! I worship my God and I serve My God only! I refuse to listen to you any longer!"

Jesus knew His authority and position. Jesus new His Father in heaven was greater than he that was standing before Him. He knew not to test the Lord God. He knew that man did not live by bread alone, but by every Word that came from the mouth of God. He knew that satan was an obstacle and did not have the mind of Christ. Jesus knew His purpose and reason for His beating heart.

Jesus knew NOT to bargain or compromise with satan.

What have you compromised in your life?
Is it an impure relationship?
Sex outside of marriage?
A "little" bit of pornography?
An adulterous relationship?
A "tiny" bit of flirting with someone who's married?
Honesty? Integrity? Character?
------------------------------------

Jesus, I pray that you would expose the lies of the enemy for what they are: lies. I pray that you would open up the hearts of all those reading these words, and I pray that you would begin to shine Truth into their minds. I pray for the Holy Spirit to war for the people who have become enslaved to sexual addiction. I pray that you begin breaking chains right now, in Jesus' name. Show us where the line needs to be drawn in our lives. Show us the way. Show us where we are being deceived. Bring us back to a heart of purity once again. In Jesus' name, Amen

No Husband??? Like forever???

"O God, you are my God,
earnestly I seek you;
my soul thirsts for you,
my body longs for you,
in a dry and weary land
where there is no HUSBAND???

Psalm 63:1
--------------------------------------------------

If you are familiar with the above Bible passage, you will recognize that the word HUSBAND has replaced the word WATER.

"...my body longs for you...where there is no water."

I've spent many of my adult years single. I was married for four years, but separated for 2 1/2 of those four years.

When I was a little girl, I wanted to grow up and be a doctor, a wife, and a mommy. I became a mommy first. I never became a doctor. My dream as a wife fizzled shortly after I said, "I do."

In the good times of my marriage, I loved being a wife. I loved cooking, taking care of the kids and house, and greeting my husband at the door. I loved the companionship and friendship. I loved the kissing and hand-holding and romance. I loved the dream of what I envisioned a marriage to be.

When times got hard, I still loved being a wife. When times got even harder, I still longed to be his wife. When things were totally dissolved, I still wanted to be a wife. After being divorced for 2 1/2 years, I still long to be someone's wife again someday.

Several months ago, God asked me if I would give Him my desire to be a wife.

I agreed and said, "Yes, God." (of course after many tears)

The last week, I have been observing couples who are in love. The "newly dating" couples. The "50 year anniversary" couples. The "Best Friend" couples.

I have found myself longing for that.

Again.

And so the wording for the above scripture was birthed...

What are you longing for today? A relationship? A job promotion? A dream? A desire? Children?

What if another husband is not in God's plan for my life? What if I'm meant to go solo until I die or until Jesus returns? Can I be o-kay with that? Will I be o-kay with that? Will I still love God the same? Will I still trust Him with my heart?

Yes. I will. And I do.

Because I know He holds my world in His hands.

So, what do I do with my desires when they come? What do I do when that dream invades my heart and longs to be fulfilled?

I go back to God and proclaim:

"O God, you are my God,

earnestly I(CHOOSE TO) seek you;

my soul(CHOOSES TO) thirst for you,

my body (CHOOSES TO) long for you,

in a dry and weary land

where there is no water_(your dream here)__

Psalm 63:1

"I'm good, thanks." (But really, I'm not!)

"Hey, I'm at the store and I'm wondering what you need," my friend's voice declares confidently on the other end of the phone.


"I'm good, thanks. I appreciate you asking! That was so sweet of you." (This tends to be a "pat" answer for me...you know...because if I did need something, I seldom would let anyone know.)


"Um...I asked you what you needed." She firmly stated.

------------------------------------------------

This is my friend, "L", who ALWAYS calls at the PERFECT moment with the simple question, "What's up?"

Now this could be just a general "how are ya?" question, but with "L", that question comes with the interpretation (implied, yet unspoken) : "God placed you on my heart just now. What's going on? How can I pray for you?"

This is also my friend, "L", who provided my "Mint green box of tissues" I wrote about HERE.

This is also my friend, "L", who shows up at my door, at the exact time that I'm praying about a need I have, with the needed item.

--------------------------------------------

As I heard her question me the second time, my mind began to replay the scenario of my quiet time with God earlier this week.

"God, these are the items I know I will run out of before I get paid again. I do not know what to do. I have no more money coming in & these are my essentials. Please provide." I wrote the list down in my prayer journal, and I continued on with my day knowing He would provide.

From the time she asked me what I needed until the time I answered her was probably only a few seconds, but it seemed like forever as I began to talk to myself and to God. I felt a "God conversation" coming on:

"You asked ME to provide, right?"

"Yes Lord, but why do I have to tell her? That's so embarrassing! Why can't you just tell "L" what I need? I dislike being 'needy'".

"Because, dear child. I'm teaching you a new thing."

"O-kay. Fine."

------------------------------------------

"I could use some toilet paper." I shyly sputtered out the words.

"O-kay, sounds good. I'll drop it off later," She said.

"Thank you SO much "L". You're an answer to my prayer!"

------------------------------------------

I LOVE being the one that can bless someone else! I LOVE being the "giver"!

I struggle with "NEEDING"! Ugh! I just want to give, give, give!

------------------------------------------

I think back to the other people who have recently asked what they can do for me. I get sad because I have been too prideful to tell them I'm in need. I have been doing so well financially over the past year and I feel like I'm stepping backward by asking for help. I have stole the blessing from them because they just wanted to bless me. It makes me sad because I get sad when I don't know how to bless someone else.

Sigh.

Thank you Jesus for another teaching moment.

I could not bring myself to ask for anything else on my "list". I was prideful. I was ashamed. I felt "less than". I felt "needy" and that's not a comfortable place for me to be.

Sigh.

When someone asks you what you need, they want to bless you. They want to truly reach out and help. Allow them to be there for you. Don't steal their blessing from them. Whether it's a meal, or an offer to babysit, or tangible items, or an offer to help clean your house, or even if you need prayer.

God is faithful to provide!

Blessings friends!

21 years ago...

...my father took his last breath...

in a hospital bed...

After hanging on...

silently...

day after day...

for 7 days...

in a coma...
-----------------------------------------------------

DAY 1- DAY 3

The doctors said:--->

He's brain dead.
Wait!

He's not brain dead.
Never mind.
I guess he's brain dead after all.
He's not breathing on his own.
He will never wake up.
He could be in a coma for years.
He will be a vegetable for the rest of his life.
"I recommend you pull the plug."

"Heaven, (15yo girl), what do YOU want?"
(I want my dad to jump up & hug me & talk to me!!!)

"...um...I don't know."

Life support disconnected.

-------------------------------------------

"It should only be a few hours now."
-------------------------------------------

Waiting.
Pacing.
Crying.
Waiting...

------------------------------------------
4 DAYS LATER...

"Maybe we should put a feeding tube in!"
"He's breathing on his own."
"There is still brain activity."
"He's hanging on."
"He's a fighter."
"I can't believe he's still here!"
"The probabilities are high!"
"He should have died."
"He can come out of this."
"Let's give it another shot!"

RECOMMENDATION...
Short Surgery time to put a feeding tube in.
(My aunt & I joyfully go eat lunch)

---------------------------------------------
INTERCOM:
(20 minutes later)

"Would the family of Jerry Moorhouse please
return to the patient's room?"
---------------------------------------------

"Wow! That was really quick!"

--------------------------------------------

"I'm sorry"
"He's gone."

"It's almost as if he waited until
no one was around...
and then gave up."

----------------------------------------------

21 YEARS AGO, My dad shot himself.
21 YEARS LATER, his 5 adult children still mourn.

-----------------------------------------------
We remember this day each year...

and still wonder...

what life would've been like if...

• He could have seen us each graduate.
• He could have "given away" his 3 daughters on their wedding days.
• He could have met his youngest son's wife.
• He could have met his oldest son's fiance.
• He could have met his grandchildren.

--------------------------------------------------

Suicide is never the answer.
Ever...

21 years is a LONG time...

To
leave
your
children
behind
to
long
for
just
one
more
word,
one
more
hug,
ONE
MORE...

"I love you."

Striving much???

Do you struggle with striving?

Catch up with me on my new blog post about this subject.

CLICK HERE TO BE REDIRECTED.

February musings

I am amazed by the amount of time that has gone by since I used to be a "regular blogger". So much has happened since I last posted. It's incredible.

I do not have internet access anymore at home and for whatever reason, I can't even post from my cell phone anymore, so thus the reason for my absence.

I am actually attending a Graham Cooke conference this weekend in Arden Hills, MN. If you have never heard of him, I HIGHLY recommend listening to some of his teachings. He speaks of identity, God's favor, and love for us. We have one more session tonight to attend, and then we head back home tomorrow afternoon. I cannot write (or process) fast enough as God is downloading His heart for me into my spirit this weekend. I have been given new eyes to see this weekend and I'm excited to take them for a "drive" for the rest of my life.

I love being amazed by my Daddy God! I love how He intentionally puts the pieces of my life together!!! I love getting to know more of His heart! I am even beginning to love it when He shows me an area of my life HE wants to improve. I am NOT where I want to be but exactly where God wants me to be. I know, I know, it's hard to comprehend that God has us exactly where we are for a purpose. After this weekend, I am convinced that I AM EXACTLY where God wants me to be, because He sees me as Perfect because of Jesus IN me!!! I'm not going to argue that one because before this weekend, I was convinced that I was anywhere EXCEPT where I was supposed to be.

I figured there was a destination I had to reach. I thought I wasn't good enough yet for God. I assumed that God would love me more if I could only reach "that place" (wherever that place is!!!) where He wanted me to be. THAT is such a lie from the enemy! I don't have enough time or space to expand on that. I just love the revelation that I have received this weekend.

Revelation? I mean "REVELATIONSSSSSSS". New eyes to see. New ears to hear. The deafness and the blindness are falling off of me.

Already, my time is through on here. :( I have been writing! Alot! Some of it on Facebook for others to see, but most of it in my journal and my future book-to-be. God willing, I should be back on a regular basis in a couple months, and I can share more, but for now, I pray that you will get new eyes to see and new ears to hear everything that God wants you to see and hear. If you want to connect on a more personal basis, feel free to connect with me on Facebook.

Blessings! Heaven