I have note cards hanging around my house. They hang in my view where I can easily spot them.
One friend told me once, "You're discouraged?!?! Just go read the notes in your bathroom!" Those notes, too, are in, ahem...view when I sit.
The problem is that they have become too familiar. I read them, yet I do not see them. I say the words, yet I do not speak the words.
Motions...just words...routines...habits...they're there...but they're not.
Today, I read the last line of one of these cards: "Thank You, Lord, for what you have done, and for what you are going to do."
I stopped...after "...what You have done..."
My facebook status this morning said something about "choosing to rejoice!" I don't like to rejoice. I don't even like to make myself rejoice. I don't even like to pretend to rejoice...
...but I do it anyway...
Or do I???
As I sat...ahem...in view of this note card in my bathroom, my heart skipped a beat, and a giggle slipped out, as I stopped at and repeated the words..."for what You HAVE DONE!"
I've been so busy worrying and claiming blessings over the things God hasn't YET done, that I have forgotten to rejoice and thank God for what He HAS DONE!
I have SO much to be grateful for! Right now! This day! This second in time! God has done SO MUCH in my life and I'm still worrying about what He hasn't done! Ugh!
I may not be able to escape the "wilderness"/desert experience I'm in right now, but I sure can determine how my attitude is in the midst of it. One of the biggest reasons the Israelites stayed in the desert so long is because they grumbled, complained, and murmured so much!
I have gotten pretty good about NOT complaining when I hit a rough patch in life, but I haven't quite mastered the art of gratitude and rejoicing during my rough patches. I don't think I will ever "master" it, but I also know that I can appear grateful without really being grateful.
The Lord sees my heart, and even though I may outwardly be "fooling" people (including myself) that I'm not complaining, I'm not able to hide from God. See, my heart is still speaking even though words aren't coming out of my mouth.
"Why hasn't _____ happened yet? Do you see what's going on God? We have a deadline here! Hello? Are you listening to me God? What about abc and xyz? Etc."
Outwardly, I smile, I read my Bible, I quote scriptures, I give, I'm patient...blah blah blah! Inwardly, I'm still looking at everything God still hasn't given me! (Even though He's provided miracle after miracle almost every day of my life!!!)
If I began listing EVERYTHING God has ALREADY DONE for me for the past 36 3/4 years, I would seriously have NO time to consider anything else but the goodness & faithfulness of God!!!
I really thought that because I wasn't verbally complaining, that I really wasn't complaining, and then couldn't figure out why I didn't have joy! It's time to get honest and really evaluate your heart attitude. Are you REALLY grateful? Are you REALLY serving? Are you REALLY seeking? Are you REALLY obeying? Are you REALLY giving? Are you REALLY being humble? Are you REALLY loving?
We can outwardly "obey", while inwardly "rebel"... God wants to deal with "heart issues"...
Will you let Him deal with yours?
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