At 9:00 a.m. yesterday, I had to shut my computer down and turn my power strip OFF...
It was hard...especially because I had just written such an awesome blog post...and I needed to check throughout the day to see who visited me and who commented to say "good job, Heaven!" I also posted it on my Facebook account, so I had to see if anyone commented there too!
...Can you tell where I'm going so soon????
If you have caught on already, then you have either been with me for awhile or else, you have gone through the same scenario, only to have God ask you to step into your own size shoes and get out of His glory.
P-R-I-D-E......
How can a 5-letter word cause soooooooooo many issues? And how in the world does it "sneak" right in there so quickly?
About the time, I think I am as humble as I possibly can be, God shows me another area of my life where pride has been hiding or where it's reared its ugly head again. Ugh!
1 Chronicles 16:29
29 ascribe to the LORD the glory due his name.
Bring an offering and come before him;
worship the LORD in the splendor of his holiness.
The glory belongs to God, not just sometimes, but ALL the time! He deserves all the praise and glory and honor.
Lord, I give this blog back to you! Use it for your purposes...If you want me to shut it down Lord, say the word. If you want me to keep blogging, then please show me the balance between celebrating successes vs. stealing Your glory. And Discipline Lord!!! I tend to get wrapped too tightly in this computer sometimes, and I need to learn how to balance life.
You have shown me that my main ministry has to be in this home with these boys! Show me how to love them the way that they need loved at this stage in their life. I will not allow myself to exit reality through blogging or reading other's blogs, but please Father, I need creative ideas to connect with Zach and Dylan.
~Heavenly Father, I thank you for your holiness. I thank you for all that you give us. I thank you for the changes you make in us. I thank you that you put up with us, even when it seems as if we are constantly doing those things that we don't want to do! You are holy and just, but you are also merciful and full of grace.
Once again, I bring before you my pride and my self-centeredness. I want to get it "right", and never have to deal with sin, yet you are the only One who is perfection...
Thank you for loving me enough not to leave me the way I am...Thank you also, Lord, that you love my children enough, to change their mommy!
Keep me teachable, and keep humbling me, so that I can be more like Christ Jesus. Thank you for searching my heart, and for pointing out those things and attitudes that do not line up with the Word of God.
In Jesus' name, Amen~
Please don't be offended if I don't visit your blog or comment as much as I used to. I really have to minimize my time on this computer for a little while. I have a child who needs more mommy time right now, which requires mommy to need more Daddy God time, because mommy has to make some much needed changes in herself in order to see change in her babies!
February 26, 2009
February 24, 2009
Letter to Heaven
Letter to myself...
There is a thing going around on "bloggy world" where you write a letter to your younger self- 20 years ago. It doesn't change anything, and obviously, you can't take your life back, but after doing this letter, it helped me realize just how much God truly had a hand in my life even back then. Although I may have regrets, I really wouldn't change a thing, because EVERYthing that has happened in my life to this point has made me the woman I am today~ A work in progress...
Dear precious girl~
You are 13 years old and I know you feel like you are all alone in the world. You have already experienced so much that a young girl your age should never have to face. There are some things you remember and some things you don't yet. I want you to know that you are not alone and that you have a future FULL of hope!
In less than a year, your whole life will change. You will be going to a new state, a huge school, and life will seem out-of-control. You are a very smart, bright, and beautiful young woman with sooooooo much potential. Believe in yourself, and don't let others make you feel any less than that.
You've just gotten your heart broken for the first time, and that boy has no clue about the woman he's going to miss out on. Shake it off and don't give him another chance because you are no one's "closet" girlfriend! You deserve better!
Right now, you may feel ugly, clumsy, awkward, and unloved, but 20-years from now, you will be a woman who is loved and cherished by many, many people. You will be a woman who is clothed with honor, integrity, and humility. You will be talented and smart, and will have a beautiful heart.
I would like to tell you that the next 20-years will be fabulous, but I can't. I would also like to tell you to make different choices, but you also can't because all of the choices you make will mold you into the woman you will become. Your experiences and the things you go through will be an amazing testimony to others who need to be understood and loved right where they are.
Here is a glimpse of what is to come. As you go through each thing, you will feel like you just want to die, but you survive and conquer and overcome ALL obstacles!
In a couple years, you will get to see your daddy again. You will be SO happy! Unfortunately, he will commit suicide within a few months of seeing him. I'm sorry. I know you've been longing for that relationship for a long time. Your prayers will be answered and he will accept Christ as his Savior...but it will not be until he's about to die.
You will be at the hospital praying over him and reading the Bible to him as he lies dying. Don't feel intimidated by the people in the room. They won't "get" it, but your daddy will. Don't get mad at God. He plans to make good come out of this situation.
When you are in high school, your mom is going to go through some rough years as well. Your home life is going to feel like it's shattering, but your mom has to go through these things to get to where she will one day be. These things ARE NOT your fault! She's doing the best that she knows how. Allow yourself to be a kid; it's not your job to hold your family together.
You know that "pain-in-the-butt" sister of yours??? She will one day be your best friend. I know, hard to believe, but there will come a day when you actually like talking to her and hanging out with her. She only tortures you because she needs love. Pay attention to her because one day, she will be your strength, your biggest cheerleader, and one of your greatest encouragers.
BE NICE TO YOUR BROTHER...He has feelings too, and he just needs to feel loved and accepted. You will crush his heart with your words and actions. Be careful with your words... Your mom is right, someday, he will be bigger than you! All that tinkering he does, well, it will come in handy, because he will one day, drop everything just to help you. He's a good brother:)
You will walk away from God, look for love in all the wrong places, seek comfort in the things that you say you will never, EVER do...
and you will try to end your life...
...more than once.
A razor will no longer be used just to shave your legs; it will become a tool to torture yourself with because you feel so worthless. Food will be forced out of your body as a way of finding some sense of control in your life. You will become an alcoholic. You will abuse drugs. You will constantly give your body away in hopes to regain that which was stolen. You will earn a horrible reputation, but that will eventually be washed away. Believe me! One day, people will NEVER be able to picture you being the woman I am describing.
...more than once.
A razor will no longer be used just to shave your legs; it will become a tool to torture yourself with because you feel so worthless. Food will be forced out of your body as a way of finding some sense of control in your life. You will become an alcoholic. You will abuse drugs. You will constantly give your body away in hopes to regain that which was stolen. You will earn a horrible reputation, but that will eventually be washed away. Believe me! One day, people will NEVER be able to picture you being the woman I am describing.
You will find love one day. . .
Remember when you were 8 years old? The doctor told your mom that you'd never have kids because of the damage, to your body, from years of sexual abuse. Ha! Ha!
HE WAS WRONG!!!
You will have TWO precious boys!!!
You may think that you will treat them as the miracles that they are, but you won't. While they are still young, you will abuse them and they will end up in foster care for a few months. You will even over-dose while they are in the next room sleeping. BUT you WILL learn to love them, you WILL learn to cherish them, you WILL end up being a good mother.
I'm sorry...
All of this has to happen in order for you to get the help you need, and to begin the process of loving others and yourself. You'll even homeschool them for a couple years and LOVE it. They will become your reason for living! They are amazing boys!!!
All of this has to happen in order for you to get the help you need, and to begin the process of loving others and yourself. You'll even homeschool them for a couple years and LOVE it. They will become your reason for living! They are amazing boys!!!
You will live in one state for almost 20 years! Crazy, huh? Yes, honey, you will one day be stable!
You will like yourself, but most important, you will LOVE yourself...and be able to let others love you. It may take awhile, but it will happen:)
You WILL find God again!
You will make many mistakes,
some even huge,
but you will learn about God's forgiveness.
...You will learn to forgive...
You will get your heart broken, but you will witness God's healing. You will see precious dreams die, but God will give you bigger and better ones.
You will watch people you love...
Die...
My mother-in-law and friend, Carol, died on September 11, 2002 from cancer.
Tony and I watched as she took her last breath...
My precious Grandma, Irene, died in 2007.
(although this picture was taken when my grandpa died,
I also held her hand, and sang to her in the wee hours before
she went to see Jesus AND grandpa!)
Tony and I watched as she took her last breath...
My precious Grandma, Irene, died in 2007.
(although this picture was taken when my grandpa died,
I also held her hand, and sang to her in the wee hours before
she went to see Jesus AND grandpa!)
God will restore you, redeem you, heal you, and make you whole. He will become your Provider, your Husband, your friend, and the Father you never had. He will become your 'all-in-all', and He will show you that even through all the bad stuff, He was there shielding you from the worse stuff...
Heaven Danell Moorhouse, you are cherished and you have a Heavenly Father who adores you and rejoices over you with singing. You have a long road ahead of you, but you will make it.
~Love, Heaven Danell (as a much older & wiser woman)
February 18, 2009
That which is past...
"...but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me...One thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining towards what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." Philippians 3:12b-14
Forget- stop remembering, dismiss from the mind, be unable to remember, to neglect willfully, to cease remembering, to omit mentioning, to lose the remembrance of, to let go from the memory, not to think of, to lose the power of (Quoted from Dictionary.com)
My LONG paraphrase of the above verse, along with the definition of forget is this: "I have to go forward, and I have to let go of the past in order to do that. This is what I do: I choose to stop remembering the old person that I was. I willfully neglect those nagging thoughts which say 'I'm not good enough'. I omit my past failures from my vocabulary. I let go of the memories which try to haunt me. I DO NOT dwell on or think of those things which are covered under the blood of Jesus. Yesterday is gone. I quit living in yesterday! I understand the cost of Jesus' sacrifice on the cross, and I'm not going to dismiss His grace and forgiveness by choosing to destroy myself with memories of the horrible person I used to be. Jesus died for me, He was beaten and chose to give up His life, not only so that I could have eternal life and a new life, but also that I wouldn't have to torture myself with all my mistakes. Therefore, I AM PRESSING ON, I AM moving forward, I AM reaching into my future and taking hold of EVERYTHING that God has for me. I will NOT let the enemy defeat me with his torment and lies by reliving my past, but I strain toward seeing the person God made me in His image, because THAT is who I am!!!"
I can forgive many people, and I have throughout my life. I've forgiven abusers, and users, and people who have done horrific things...yet...it is hard to forgive myself. Over the past few weeks, God has really been speaking to me about not letting my past hold me back. I've been afraid to go forward and to quit going around the mountain because I've believed these nagging thoughts:
"You will always let God down, why even try? You will always fall short of what God wants you to do! Why in the world would God forgive you again? You're never going to get it right, just look at this and this and this....You are definitely on the verge of losing God's forgiveness because you are constantly doing wrong. You'll never measure up or become a "good" Christian. You're just a failure. How can you teach Sunday School or be on the worship team when you can't even control your own kids or ever 'get it right' in your life? You're a fake and a joke and a hypocrite, you may as well walk away from everything..."
Some of these comments are a little bold, but when you don't truly understand God's forgiveness, you can't forgive yourself. That's when the enemy comes in and slowly gets you to believe the condemning thoughts above. We get ourselves wrapped in "religion", which most of us grew up in (My mother's favorite was: 'Vengeance is mine saith the Lord!!!' God's wrath is worse than mine!')
My mother did the best she could, and passed on the judgment she believed to be truth. I grew up believing that God was going to run around with lightning until He could finally strike me. I pictured a mean, old daddy, sitting up in heaven, snapping His belt, just waiting for me to screw up. He loved me when I was good, but I had better watch out if I was bad! Anytime that anything bad happened, it was because of God's wrath. Unfortunately, early in my parenting, I planted this image in my children's hearts. Sadly, I found myself recently, portraying that image to my 12-year old son. I instantly felt God say,
"I love Zachary. Why in the world would you say that? That is not me, Heaven. I love you and I adore your children and I only want the best for you! Zachary is not going to lose my love if he's not where YOU think he should be. My beautiful daughter, you don't have to worry about losing my love either! I cherish you! I may correct you, but I will never punish you. I want you to find out the truth about my love and forgiveness..."
We had a special speaker on Sunday, who gave an illustration of God's forgiveness that brought me to tears. He pretended that He was God and he was writing in the Lamb's book of life. A man from the audience was to come up three times and take His pen, but each time ask for forgiveness. This is the dialogue:
Man takes God's pen...
God says, "Please give my pen back."
Man says, "I'm sorry God. Will you forgive me?"
God says, "Yes, I forgive you."
Man takes God's pen again...The same dialogue occurs again.
Man takes God's pen a third time...
God says, "please give my pen back."
Man says, "I'm sorry God. Will you forgive me AGAIN?"
God says, "What do you mean again? It's the first time you took my pen, of course, I forgive you!"
Psalm 103:10-12 [God] does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities. 11 For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is His love for those who fear Him; 12 as far as the east is to the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us."
That is the God we serve, and that is the God who loves us and forgives us, and remembers our sins no more...
I just found this on YouTube. It is Mark Hall from Casting Crowns doing a short teaching on their song "East to the West". Brought me to tears:)
So, let's press on, leaving the past behind us, and take hold of ALL that God has for our future...
~Learning about the God who forgives~
Forget- stop remembering, dismiss from the mind, be unable to remember, to neglect willfully, to cease remembering, to omit mentioning, to lose the remembrance of, to let go from the memory, not to think of, to lose the power of (Quoted from Dictionary.com)
My LONG paraphrase of the above verse, along with the definition of forget is this: "I have to go forward, and I have to let go of the past in order to do that. This is what I do: I choose to stop remembering the old person that I was. I willfully neglect those nagging thoughts which say 'I'm not good enough'. I omit my past failures from my vocabulary. I let go of the memories which try to haunt me. I DO NOT dwell on or think of those things which are covered under the blood of Jesus. Yesterday is gone. I quit living in yesterday! I understand the cost of Jesus' sacrifice on the cross, and I'm not going to dismiss His grace and forgiveness by choosing to destroy myself with memories of the horrible person I used to be. Jesus died for me, He was beaten and chose to give up His life, not only so that I could have eternal life and a new life, but also that I wouldn't have to torture myself with all my mistakes. Therefore, I AM PRESSING ON, I AM moving forward, I AM reaching into my future and taking hold of EVERYTHING that God has for me. I will NOT let the enemy defeat me with his torment and lies by reliving my past, but I strain toward seeing the person God made me in His image, because THAT is who I am!!!"
I can forgive many people, and I have throughout my life. I've forgiven abusers, and users, and people who have done horrific things...yet...it is hard to forgive myself. Over the past few weeks, God has really been speaking to me about not letting my past hold me back. I've been afraid to go forward and to quit going around the mountain because I've believed these nagging thoughts:
"You will always let God down, why even try? You will always fall short of what God wants you to do! Why in the world would God forgive you again? You're never going to get it right, just look at this and this and this....You are definitely on the verge of losing God's forgiveness because you are constantly doing wrong. You'll never measure up or become a "good" Christian. You're just a failure. How can you teach Sunday School or be on the worship team when you can't even control your own kids or ever 'get it right' in your life? You're a fake and a joke and a hypocrite, you may as well walk away from everything..."
Some of these comments are a little bold, but when you don't truly understand God's forgiveness, you can't forgive yourself. That's when the enemy comes in and slowly gets you to believe the condemning thoughts above. We get ourselves wrapped in "religion", which most of us grew up in (My mother's favorite was: 'Vengeance is mine saith the Lord!!!' God's wrath is worse than mine!')
My mother did the best she could, and passed on the judgment she believed to be truth. I grew up believing that God was going to run around with lightning until He could finally strike me. I pictured a mean, old daddy, sitting up in heaven, snapping His belt, just waiting for me to screw up. He loved me when I was good, but I had better watch out if I was bad! Anytime that anything bad happened, it was because of God's wrath. Unfortunately, early in my parenting, I planted this image in my children's hearts. Sadly, I found myself recently, portraying that image to my 12-year old son. I instantly felt God say,
"I love Zachary. Why in the world would you say that? That is not me, Heaven. I love you and I adore your children and I only want the best for you! Zachary is not going to lose my love if he's not where YOU think he should be. My beautiful daughter, you don't have to worry about losing my love either! I cherish you! I may correct you, but I will never punish you. I want you to find out the truth about my love and forgiveness..."
We had a special speaker on Sunday, who gave an illustration of God's forgiveness that brought me to tears. He pretended that He was God and he was writing in the Lamb's book of life. A man from the audience was to come up three times and take His pen, but each time ask for forgiveness. This is the dialogue:
Man takes God's pen...
God says, "Please give my pen back."
Man says, "I'm sorry God. Will you forgive me?"
God says, "Yes, I forgive you."
Man takes God's pen again...The same dialogue occurs again.
Man takes God's pen a third time...
God says, "please give my pen back."
Man says, "I'm sorry God. Will you forgive me AGAIN?"
God says, "What do you mean again? It's the first time you took my pen, of course, I forgive you!"
Psalm 103:10-12 [God] does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities. 11 For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is His love for those who fear Him; 12 as far as the east is to the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us."
That is the God we serve, and that is the God who loves us and forgives us, and remembers our sins no more...
I just found this on YouTube. It is Mark Hall from Casting Crowns doing a short teaching on their song "East to the West". Brought me to tears:)
Here is the music video of this song:
So, let's press on, leaving the past behind us, and take hold of ALL that God has for our future...
~Learning about the God who forgives~
February 13, 2009
What to do....
You ever have one of those days where you could easily get tangled up in someone else's chains??? I'm having one of those weeks. Ugh!
There is nothing else that the enemy would like more than to wrap tons of people into one well crafted, woven web of offenses.
You know the kind...Someone totally offends your friend, who then tells you, which raises "how could they?" questions in you, which in turn, makes you want to go back to that person, and "chew" them out for offending your friend...
I have worked hard at not getting entangled in these kinds of messes. I used to do it quite often. I always felt I HAD to fix and restore things to the "right" state of peace. Ha! My involvement always made it worse! When it's my family or close friends that are affected, I tend to really want to jump in there, and have my dollar's worth of words.
I actually left two churches because of getting involved in other's offenses. Not the greatest thing to admit, but may as well be honest. I allowed myself to get so entangled in the web from my last church departure, that I smooshed God's plan for me to become a worship leader there.
So, I'm here again...am I going to go around the mountain AGAIN, or am I going to learn whatever it is that God wants to show me... I am hurt and I want to fix this and I want to make it all better...but I can't. I know this!!!
Yet, the question comes down to am I going to be loyal to God or to my family member? And I don't even think it's about loyalty, yet somewhere in my past, I was told that you ALWAYS are loyal to your family...
I really need prayer that I will NOT even touch this one, because it truly doesn't involve me, and that it will not affect my relationship because I chose not to batter up in "loyalty" for this one.
There is nothing else that the enemy would like more than to wrap tons of people into one well crafted, woven web of offenses.
You know the kind...Someone totally offends your friend, who then tells you, which raises "how could they?" questions in you, which in turn, makes you want to go back to that person, and "chew" them out for offending your friend...
I have worked hard at not getting entangled in these kinds of messes. I used to do it quite often. I always felt I HAD to fix and restore things to the "right" state of peace. Ha! My involvement always made it worse! When it's my family or close friends that are affected, I tend to really want to jump in there, and have my dollar's worth of words.
I actually left two churches because of getting involved in other's offenses. Not the greatest thing to admit, but may as well be honest. I allowed myself to get so entangled in the web from my last church departure, that I smooshed God's plan for me to become a worship leader there.
So, I'm here again...am I going to go around the mountain AGAIN, or am I going to learn whatever it is that God wants to show me... I am hurt and I want to fix this and I want to make it all better...but I can't. I know this!!!
Yet, the question comes down to am I going to be loyal to God or to my family member? And I don't even think it's about loyalty, yet somewhere in my past, I was told that you ALWAYS are loyal to your family...
I really need prayer that I will NOT even touch this one, because it truly doesn't involve me, and that it will not affect my relationship because I chose not to batter up in "loyalty" for this one.
February 10, 2009
Storms and faith...
God is good...He is great...He is amazing...He rocks!
It's amazing the things that people, even as Christians, have to go through. I think sometimes, we decide that because we follow Christ, we are exempt from trials and struggles. We think if we pray enough, read our Bible enough, fast enough, be a "good enough" Christian, and seek enough, that our lives will be "easy breezy". Well, I tend to think that sometimes at least.
This week, as I've listened to Christian radio programs, I've heard 3 or 4 programs on trials and faith that really spoke to me. Not the kind of faith knowing the sun will come up every day, but the heart-wrenching, "my world feels like it's falling apart" kind of faith.
The kind of faith that when a storm hits your life, you cling onto for dear life for fear of being swept away by the ferocious and raging winds.
The kind of faith that you depend on the finances of heaven because you can't pay your mortgage, or you lose your "stable" job, and can't pay the thousands of dollars in hospital bills when illness and disease smashes against your family's health.
The kind of faith that causes you to crawl up, like a small, scared child, on the lap of your Heavenly Father because you just found out that you or your child has been diagnosed with cancer or a terminal illness.
The kind of faith that brings you to your knees when God tells you to take off your wedding ring because your marriage will never be restored.
"God, what if I become a 'better' person? Then, will you remove or fix this storm?"
One of the speakers I heard this week said, "For every person that gets cancer, God will also allow a Christian to get cancer, so that the world can see the difference of going through cancer with God, and going through cancer without God." It made me really think. God doesn't cause bad things to happen, but He does allow them because He's still in control, and His plans for our lives are much bigger than what we can ever comprehend!"
As I went through my life experiences, I found comfort in the "why's", and became aware of the striving I do to be a "better" person in hopes to "escape" some of the storms in my life.
What if God chooses not to ever take my child's emotional issues from him? Will I still trust God for his future?
What if God never, ever allows me to re-marry my ex-husband, or never provides me with another husband? Will I still trust God to be my companion, provide for me, and still choose to find joy in the midst of it?
What if God never ___(your dream here)___? Will you still call him Lord? Will you still allow Him to direct your steps? Will you follow even though you may never get the answers to the "why's"? Will you trust that He knows the plan for your future, and that it is filled with hope, not harm? Will you bow and say, "Yes, Lord", even though your heart wants to stand and scream, "wwwhhhhyyyyyy?"
In Matthew 14:22-33, Jesus is walking on the water and the disciples think He is a ghost. This is what Jesus says:
27But Jesus immediately said to them: "Take courage! It is I. Don't be afraid."
Notice that the wind was blowing when Jesus asked Peter to walk on the water. While Peter was on the water, the wind was still blowing. While Peter became afraid and began to sink, the Lord reached out his hand and caught him, YET the wind was still blowing. Did you notice that it must have been a ferocious wind for Peter to become afraid? Yet, did you notice that the wind continued to rage even once Peter was in Jesus' grasp? Did you notice that Jesus didn't "freak" out at all during that episode? He wasn't even surprised that Peter would begin to sink because He was IMMEDIATELY ready to catch Peter.
God is ready to catch you too as the (or when the) storms rage around you. God doesn't always take our storms from us, but He does reach out and surround us during them. For every non-believer that suffers through something in life, so also, will a Christian suffer in that same thing, so that Christ's comfort and peace can radiate rays of light to the world around us.
The next time a "storm" rages in your life, I pray you will be more willing to say, "Yes Lord, here I am, use me."
It's amazing the things that people, even as Christians, have to go through. I think sometimes, we decide that because we follow Christ, we are exempt from trials and struggles. We think if we pray enough, read our Bible enough, fast enough, be a "good enough" Christian, and seek enough, that our lives will be "easy breezy". Well, I tend to think that sometimes at least.
This week, as I've listened to Christian radio programs, I've heard 3 or 4 programs on trials and faith that really spoke to me. Not the kind of faith knowing the sun will come up every day, but the heart-wrenching, "my world feels like it's falling apart" kind of faith.
The kind of faith that when a storm hits your life, you cling onto for dear life for fear of being swept away by the ferocious and raging winds.
The kind of faith that you depend on the finances of heaven because you can't pay your mortgage, or you lose your "stable" job, and can't pay the thousands of dollars in hospital bills when illness and disease smashes against your family's health.
The kind of faith that causes you to crawl up, like a small, scared child, on the lap of your Heavenly Father because you just found out that you or your child has been diagnosed with cancer or a terminal illness.
The kind of faith that brings you to your knees when God tells you to take off your wedding ring because your marriage will never be restored.
"God, what if I become a 'better' person? Then, will you remove or fix this storm?"
One of the speakers I heard this week said, "For every person that gets cancer, God will also allow a Christian to get cancer, so that the world can see the difference of going through cancer with God, and going through cancer without God." It made me really think. God doesn't cause bad things to happen, but He does allow them because He's still in control, and His plans for our lives are much bigger than what we can ever comprehend!"
As I went through my life experiences, I found comfort in the "why's", and became aware of the striving I do to be a "better" person in hopes to "escape" some of the storms in my life.
What if God chooses not to ever take my child's emotional issues from him? Will I still trust God for his future?
What if God never, ever allows me to re-marry my ex-husband, or never provides me with another husband? Will I still trust God to be my companion, provide for me, and still choose to find joy in the midst of it?
What if God never ___(your dream here)___? Will you still call him Lord? Will you still allow Him to direct your steps? Will you follow even though you may never get the answers to the "why's"? Will you trust that He knows the plan for your future, and that it is filled with hope, not harm? Will you bow and say, "Yes, Lord", even though your heart wants to stand and scream, "wwwhhhhyyyyyy?"
In Matthew 14:22-33, Jesus is walking on the water and the disciples think He is a ghost. This is what Jesus says:
27But Jesus immediately said to them: "Take courage! It is I. Don't be afraid."
28"Lord, if it's you," Peter replied, "tell me to come to you on the water."
29"Come," he said.
Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. 30But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, "Lord, save me!"
31Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. "You of little faith," he said, "why did you doubt?"
32And when they climbed into the boat, the wind died down.Notice that the wind was blowing when Jesus asked Peter to walk on the water. While Peter was on the water, the wind was still blowing. While Peter became afraid and began to sink, the Lord reached out his hand and caught him, YET the wind was still blowing. Did you notice that it must have been a ferocious wind for Peter to become afraid? Yet, did you notice that the wind continued to rage even once Peter was in Jesus' grasp? Did you notice that Jesus didn't "freak" out at all during that episode? He wasn't even surprised that Peter would begin to sink because He was IMMEDIATELY ready to catch Peter.
God is ready to catch you too as the (or when the) storms rage around you. God doesn't always take our storms from us, but He does reach out and surround us during them. For every non-believer that suffers through something in life, so also, will a Christian suffer in that same thing, so that Christ's comfort and peace can radiate rays of light to the world around us.
The next time a "storm" rages in your life, I pray you will be more willing to say, "Yes Lord, here I am, use me."
Jeremiah 29:11-12 (New International Version)
11 For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 12 Then you will call upon me, and you will come and pray to me, and I will listen to you."
February 7, 2009
Obligations
Dictionary. com defines obligation as something by which a person is bound or obliged to do certain things, and which arises out of a sense of duty or results from custom, law, etc.
Do you have obligations in your life? I believe there are healthy obligations and unhealthy obligations. God has given us each a job to do here on earth, and we do that job despite our feelings. But at other times, we allow our feelings to lock us into obligations that are not healthy. Guilt and condemnation drive us to do things that first of all, God never asked us to do, and second of all, they make our lives "busy" and hectic, leaving us feeling like a "bad" person if we do not do them.
When you become a parent, you are obligated to take care of your child and to be a good parent. Yes, it is a blessing to be a parent, but let's be honest. There are days you don't feel like getting out of bed and being a parent, but you do because it is your obligation (your job) to take care of your kids. You do this despite your feelings.
When you have a job, even if you love it, you are obligated to show up for work and to do your duties. You also do this despite your feelings.
When you serve others, you are obligated to serve them as if you are serving the Lord.
Well, you don't have to, but what's the point if you're not doing it for God. You do this despite your feelings.
The bottom line is that we all have certain obligations in life. What happens when we do things out of guilt or condemnation? They become unhealthy obligations. I'm just speaking in general, and I'm sure someone could counteract this with an example that would defy this thought, but it's early in the morning, and my brain is thinking simple here.
I have a point to this, and I want to share what I am thinking by writing all of this.
Today, I want to talk about the unhealthy obligations that complicate our lives and make us too "busy" to do the things that God wants us to do. Let's start with the computer...(yep, here it comes)
How many hours do you spend on the computer daily? I'm singing to the soloist here, because I am on this same journey. The computer and the internet are amazing tools to spread the gospel and share Jesus, but even too much of a good thing can be a bad thing.
I am reading countless blogs of people who are taking a "break" from blogging because it is consuming their lives. Praise God! We're all on a similar journey. It's learning balance in the midst of our God given talents. We are asked to exhort (encourage) one another and lift each other. Yes, we do that, another praise God!
Although there are tons of examples of unhealthy obligations in our lives, I am going to focus on blogging right now. If you haven't been convicted of the amount of time you spend in this little world of blogs, don't worry, you will:) God wants us all to get our priorities straight and in order so we can do the job He's called us to do.
If you want to simplify your blogging life, read on. If not, it will just be a bunch of words.
1. You don't have to post everyday!!! There are times that I rack my brain for something thing to write, and realize, uh...duh...maybe I'm not meant to today.
2. Write for God... Write when God tells you to write, and write the words He's sharing with you. When you listen to the Holy Spirit, the words come and they flow and you have an amazing post within a short amount of time.
3. Don't follow a blog just because someone follows yours! It's a nice gesture, but totally not worth it. We want to repay the favor since we are so caught up on "politeness", but your dashboard will pay for it later. You end up with 149 blogs to read every day, and because you are so polite, you will feel obligated to read and comment and keep track of everyone at all times and before you know it, you have just spent hours on the computer.
4. Unfollow blogs! It's okay! I totally release you from following my blog!!! Totally. If you are following simply because I followed yours, and my blog doesn't speak to you, LET GO!
5. Don't let numbers define your "bloggy" self-worth! Just don't do it!!! A person with 149 followers isn't any more important than a person with 2. The person with 149 followers does have more obligated followers. Sorry, it's the truth. You follow them, so they follow you. You comment on theirs, so they feel obligated to comment on yours. It's a crazy cycle that will continue to get worse.
6. Release people of their obligation to follow you and to comment...Speaks for itself.
Learn to be o-kay with who you are in Christ. You are cherished and loved and adored and God longs to visit you constantly!!! He follows you, pursues you, and hangs on to your every breath and word. He rejoices over you with singing!!! He has tons of comments for you that don't change...if you'll listen! Comments on your blog mean nothing to your self-worth, except that it's a false sense of who you are. Get a picture of the God who LOVES you, even knowing EVERYTHING about you! If these people on your blog really knew everything about you, your quirks and all, you probably wouldn't have many followers. BUT CHRIST DIED FOR YOU KNOWING YOU WOULD HURT HIM OVER AND OVER AGAIN! That is a follower I want and the One I truly want to follow.
7. If you give something away, don't go through the whole ordeal of having someone blog about your giveaway, then follow you, then comment to you, and for another entry, comment again. Sorry, but that falls into the numbers game and you end up, once again, in a cycle of a false sense of self-worth, and your dashboard will despise you, your inbox will be crammed full of time-consuming e-mails. Is it really worth it???
8. If you follow someone, truly do it because you believe in what they are saying, and because they will tweak you to become more like Christ, or a better cook, or a better mother, or a better plant person, etc. I follow one woman strickly because she makes me laugh. ADHDme is my dose of laughter in a world where life gets too serious sometimes. She's better than a joke book, and she's real, and she writes about real things. Do as Betty does, and make a blog folder on your favorites, and visit that way.
My blog isn't for everyone. ADHDme's blog isn't for everyone. Chatty Kelly's blog isn't for everyone. We ALL have a population that God wants us to reach, and when we can truly step into that position and do that job, we truly will be able to reach who He puts on our blogs. Pray over your blog and don't change who you are simply because someone else has more followers than you. You are You! And God wants to use YOU to speak life into people. That is part of being who God has called you to be:)
Rejoice! Celebrate! Because God loves you with an everlasting love! You are important, but not because of your actions. You are important simply because you are!!!
Simplify your life, and free yourself of some unhealthy obligations in your life. (Now that I'm going to go down to 2 followers, I'm going to go get a dose of self-esteem from my Heavenly Father. LOL) Love ya guys!
Do you have obligations in your life? I believe there are healthy obligations and unhealthy obligations. God has given us each a job to do here on earth, and we do that job despite our feelings. But at other times, we allow our feelings to lock us into obligations that are not healthy. Guilt and condemnation drive us to do things that first of all, God never asked us to do, and second of all, they make our lives "busy" and hectic, leaving us feeling like a "bad" person if we do not do them.
When you become a parent, you are obligated to take care of your child and to be a good parent. Yes, it is a blessing to be a parent, but let's be honest. There are days you don't feel like getting out of bed and being a parent, but you do because it is your obligation (your job) to take care of your kids. You do this despite your feelings.
When you have a job, even if you love it, you are obligated to show up for work and to do your duties. You also do this despite your feelings.
When you serve others, you are obligated to serve them as if you are serving the Lord.
Well, you don't have to, but what's the point if you're not doing it for God. You do this despite your feelings.
The bottom line is that we all have certain obligations in life. What happens when we do things out of guilt or condemnation? They become unhealthy obligations. I'm just speaking in general, and I'm sure someone could counteract this with an example that would defy this thought, but it's early in the morning, and my brain is thinking simple here.
I have a point to this, and I want to share what I am thinking by writing all of this.
Today, I want to talk about the unhealthy obligations that complicate our lives and make us too "busy" to do the things that God wants us to do. Let's start with the computer...(yep, here it comes)
How many hours do you spend on the computer daily? I'm singing to the soloist here, because I am on this same journey. The computer and the internet are amazing tools to spread the gospel and share Jesus, but even too much of a good thing can be a bad thing.
I am reading countless blogs of people who are taking a "break" from blogging because it is consuming their lives. Praise God! We're all on a similar journey. It's learning balance in the midst of our God given talents. We are asked to exhort (encourage) one another and lift each other. Yes, we do that, another praise God!
Although there are tons of examples of unhealthy obligations in our lives, I am going to focus on blogging right now. If you haven't been convicted of the amount of time you spend in this little world of blogs, don't worry, you will:) God wants us all to get our priorities straight and in order so we can do the job He's called us to do.
If you want to simplify your blogging life, read on. If not, it will just be a bunch of words.
1. You don't have to post everyday!!! There are times that I rack my brain for something thing to write, and realize, uh...duh...maybe I'm not meant to today.
2. Write for God... Write when God tells you to write, and write the words He's sharing with you. When you listen to the Holy Spirit, the words come and they flow and you have an amazing post within a short amount of time.
3. Don't follow a blog just because someone follows yours! It's a nice gesture, but totally not worth it. We want to repay the favor since we are so caught up on "politeness", but your dashboard will pay for it later. You end up with 149 blogs to read every day, and because you are so polite, you will feel obligated to read and comment and keep track of everyone at all times and before you know it, you have just spent hours on the computer.
4. Unfollow blogs! It's okay! I totally release you from following my blog!!! Totally. If you are following simply because I followed yours, and my blog doesn't speak to you, LET GO!
5. Don't let numbers define your "bloggy" self-worth! Just don't do it!!! A person with 149 followers isn't any more important than a person with 2. The person with 149 followers does have more obligated followers. Sorry, it's the truth. You follow them, so they follow you. You comment on theirs, so they feel obligated to comment on yours. It's a crazy cycle that will continue to get worse.
6. Release people of their obligation to follow you and to comment...Speaks for itself.
Learn to be o-kay with who you are in Christ. You are cherished and loved and adored and God longs to visit you constantly!!! He follows you, pursues you, and hangs on to your every breath and word. He rejoices over you with singing!!! He has tons of comments for you that don't change...if you'll listen! Comments on your blog mean nothing to your self-worth, except that it's a false sense of who you are. Get a picture of the God who LOVES you, even knowing EVERYTHING about you! If these people on your blog really knew everything about you, your quirks and all, you probably wouldn't have many followers. BUT CHRIST DIED FOR YOU KNOWING YOU WOULD HURT HIM OVER AND OVER AGAIN! That is a follower I want and the One I truly want to follow.
7. If you give something away, don't go through the whole ordeal of having someone blog about your giveaway, then follow you, then comment to you, and for another entry, comment again. Sorry, but that falls into the numbers game and you end up, once again, in a cycle of a false sense of self-worth, and your dashboard will despise you, your inbox will be crammed full of time-consuming e-mails. Is it really worth it???
8. If you follow someone, truly do it because you believe in what they are saying, and because they will tweak you to become more like Christ, or a better cook, or a better mother, or a better plant person, etc. I follow one woman strickly because she makes me laugh. ADHDme is my dose of laughter in a world where life gets too serious sometimes. She's better than a joke book, and she's real, and she writes about real things. Do as Betty does, and make a blog folder on your favorites, and visit that way.
My blog isn't for everyone. ADHDme's blog isn't for everyone. Chatty Kelly's blog isn't for everyone. We ALL have a population that God wants us to reach, and when we can truly step into that position and do that job, we truly will be able to reach who He puts on our blogs. Pray over your blog and don't change who you are simply because someone else has more followers than you. You are You! And God wants to use YOU to speak life into people. That is part of being who God has called you to be:)
Rejoice! Celebrate! Because God loves you with an everlasting love! You are important, but not because of your actions. You are important simply because you are!!!
Simplify your life, and free yourself of some unhealthy obligations in your life. (Now that I'm going to go down to 2 followers, I'm going to go get a dose of self-esteem from my Heavenly Father. LOL) Love ya guys!
February 5, 2009
Prayer of Jabez
My friend Debbie, at Live...from Ninevah has been reading the Prayer of Jabez. She is definitely reaping from reading this book, and from seeking the face of God.
If you haven't read this book yet, I encourage you to. I've read it twice and from reading her blog, I'm getting prompted to read it again:) If you do not have this book, visit Debbie as she has copies that she is giving away.
Blessings to all my bloggy friends today!
If you haven't read this book yet, I encourage you to. I've read it twice and from reading her blog, I'm getting prompted to read it again:) If you do not have this book, visit Debbie as she has copies that she is giving away.
Blessings to all my bloggy friends today!
February 4, 2009
Building
"And it will be said! Build up, build up, prepare the road! Remove the obstacles out of the way of my people." Isaiah 57:14
Dictionary.com uses these words to define "Build": to construct, establish, increase, strengthen, to mold, form, create, assemble, to prepare in stages
In my Bible commentary it says this: "To the faithful ones in exile, God promises that a highway will be constructed for their return, and every obstruction will be removed."
Who is doing the building? What needs to be accomplished in order for the building to occur? Is it as simple as God speaking, and it is so? Or is it possible that an action needs to be done in order for the construction to begin? These are just questions coming to my mind as I write this.
"Build up, build up, prepare the road..."
...prepare in stages...I like that definition of "build".
From the moment we accept Christ as our personal Savior, the foundation of eternity is established. What happens from there determines the relationship we have with Christ. Little by little, we allow God to mold us, shape us, sift us, empty us, and then fill us. We are prepared in stages...a brick at a time.
Do you ever get frustrated with your growth as a Christ follower? Do you get irritated with yourself because you don't "get things right fast enough"? Do you feel like you let God down often? Do you stare at the image in the mirror and question in disgust how God can keep loving you despite your shortcomings?
You are being built...one brick at a time...and each brick is placed on your foundation at the exact moment that God places it there. Building is done in stages, in steps, one brick at a time, one layer at a time, in an orderly fashion, with each one being carefully and methodically arranged to create the house of your life.
The bricklayer is skilled, and precise, and knows exactly where each brick should lie. He has a master blueprint and everything is built off of that. He knows the end result...he knows where every brick needs to go in order to complete the masterpiece. He envisions every step of the way, and is prepared for anything that doesn't go according to plan.
He is ready for the rain, the snow, the sleet, and the hail, and each step he takes in building this house is carefully planned.
God is the same way, except He truly is the Master!
You ARE right where God knows you are! Are you at completion? No, I don't believe we get there until we are heaven. Even if it takes a little more time to get the house built, it's still being built, and the bricklayer is truly there every step of the way.
Yes, there are choices we make that slow down our progress, but it doesn't mean the house is done being built. Just as the bricklayer has to rearrange his timing because of rain or weather, God also sits and waits for our attitudes to pass, so He can finish what He started.
It's not over...it's a process...it's a journey...and God's gifts and callings are without repentance... God is not done working on you, and isn't about to give up on you! I don't know who I am writing this for, but you haven't "messed up" so bad that God is done with you!!!
~Heavenly Father, I am so thankful that You do not give up on us. There are times that our choices get us into some pretty big messes, but even then, you don't turn Your backs on us. You pick us up, brush us off, take our hands, and continue leading us on the path You have called us to. You are awesome, Lord! Thank you that even when we detour off of life's journey, you put enough obstacles in our path to bring us back to the 'main road'. Thank you that NOTHING can separate us from Your love and that You know EXACTLY where we are at every single moment. Continue to lead me, guide me, love me, and build me... In Jesus' precious name, Amen~
Dictionary.com uses these words to define "Build": to construct, establish, increase, strengthen, to mold, form, create, assemble, to prepare in stages
In my Bible commentary it says this: "To the faithful ones in exile, God promises that a highway will be constructed for their return, and every obstruction will be removed."
Who is doing the building? What needs to be accomplished in order for the building to occur? Is it as simple as God speaking, and it is so? Or is it possible that an action needs to be done in order for the construction to begin? These are just questions coming to my mind as I write this.
"Build up, build up, prepare the road..."
...prepare in stages...I like that definition of "build".
From the moment we accept Christ as our personal Savior, the foundation of eternity is established. What happens from there determines the relationship we have with Christ. Little by little, we allow God to mold us, shape us, sift us, empty us, and then fill us. We are prepared in stages...a brick at a time.
Do you ever get frustrated with your growth as a Christ follower? Do you get irritated with yourself because you don't "get things right fast enough"? Do you feel like you let God down often? Do you stare at the image in the mirror and question in disgust how God can keep loving you despite your shortcomings?
You are being built...one brick at a time...and each brick is placed on your foundation at the exact moment that God places it there. Building is done in stages, in steps, one brick at a time, one layer at a time, in an orderly fashion, with each one being carefully and methodically arranged to create the house of your life.
The bricklayer is skilled, and precise, and knows exactly where each brick should lie. He has a master blueprint and everything is built off of that. He knows the end result...he knows where every brick needs to go in order to complete the masterpiece. He envisions every step of the way, and is prepared for anything that doesn't go according to plan.
He is ready for the rain, the snow, the sleet, and the hail, and each step he takes in building this house is carefully planned.
God is the same way, except He truly is the Master!
You ARE right where God knows you are! Are you at completion? No, I don't believe we get there until we are heaven. Even if it takes a little more time to get the house built, it's still being built, and the bricklayer is truly there every step of the way.
Yes, there are choices we make that slow down our progress, but it doesn't mean the house is done being built. Just as the bricklayer has to rearrange his timing because of rain or weather, God also sits and waits for our attitudes to pass, so He can finish what He started.
It's not over...it's a process...it's a journey...and God's gifts and callings are without repentance... God is not done working on you, and isn't about to give up on you! I don't know who I am writing this for, but you haven't "messed up" so bad that God is done with you!!!
~Heavenly Father, I am so thankful that You do not give up on us. There are times that our choices get us into some pretty big messes, but even then, you don't turn Your backs on us. You pick us up, brush us off, take our hands, and continue leading us on the path You have called us to. You are awesome, Lord! Thank you that even when we detour off of life's journey, you put enough obstacles in our path to bring us back to the 'main road'. Thank you that NOTHING can separate us from Your love and that You know EXACTLY where we are at every single moment. Continue to lead me, guide me, love me, and build me... In Jesus' precious name, Amen~
February 2, 2009
not the end...update included
"Awake, awake, O Zion, clothe yourself with strength. Put on your garments of splendor, O Jerusalem, the holy city. The uncircumcised and defiled will not enter you again. Shake off your dust, rise up, sit enthroned, O Jerusalem. Free yourself from the chains on your neck, O captive Daughter of Zion, For this is what the Lord says: "You were sold for nothing, and without money you will be redeemed." Isaiah 52:1-3
God is sooooooooo good!!! I just love Him. I have court in less than 2 hours, and I was sitting here depressed and mourning, so to speak because this is my final divorce hearing.
...GOD SHOWED UP to comfort me and strengthen me in the His words above from Isaiah, and confirmed that, "yes, this is what you are supposed to do..."
God knows the circumstances that ended this marriage, and God knows the future, therefore, I choose to trust that this is "not the end of my life", but actually a "new beginning."
When a prisoner is released from prison and the chains are removed from him, he doesn't say, "Oh no, put them back on, I'd like to remain captive for awhile longer."
Instead, he steps out of the prison doors, takes a deep breath of fresh air, maybe takes one look back, but then looks straight in front of him, and moves forward, one foot in front of the other.
...WITH JOY AND PEACE...
"Joy comes in the morning..." This is my "morning". These are the words in the new chapter of my life. I am not going to look back, and I'm not going to mourn any longer.
This has been a long journey, and praise God, this is not the end of the book...just the beginning of a new chapter...
God is good...ALL THE TIME...AND ALL THE TIME...GOD IS GOOD!!!
Update: Court went amazingly well. He appeared by phone, and we were out within 15 minutes. It was very agreeable, and everything went as planned. No "garbage" or "baggage" had to be brought up, so praise God (for both him and I).
See, God not only loves me, but He also loves Tony. Not only did God protect my dignity, He also protected Tony's:) Now, that is the God I serve!!! What a mighty, loving, and Awesome God we serve:)
God is sooooooooo good!!! I just love Him. I have court in less than 2 hours, and I was sitting here depressed and mourning, so to speak because this is my final divorce hearing.
...GOD SHOWED UP to comfort me and strengthen me in the His words above from Isaiah, and confirmed that, "yes, this is what you are supposed to do..."
God knows the circumstances that ended this marriage, and God knows the future, therefore, I choose to trust that this is "not the end of my life", but actually a "new beginning."
When a prisoner is released from prison and the chains are removed from him, he doesn't say, "Oh no, put them back on, I'd like to remain captive for awhile longer."
Instead, he steps out of the prison doors, takes a deep breath of fresh air, maybe takes one look back, but then looks straight in front of him, and moves forward, one foot in front of the other.
...WITH JOY AND PEACE...
"Joy comes in the morning..." This is my "morning". These are the words in the new chapter of my life. I am not going to look back, and I'm not going to mourn any longer.
This has been a long journey, and praise God, this is not the end of the book...just the beginning of a new chapter...
God is good...ALL THE TIME...AND ALL THE TIME...GOD IS GOOD!!!
Update: Court went amazingly well. He appeared by phone, and we were out within 15 minutes. It was very agreeable, and everything went as planned. No "garbage" or "baggage" had to be brought up, so praise God (for both him and I).
See, God not only loves me, but He also loves Tony. Not only did God protect my dignity, He also protected Tony's:) Now, that is the God I serve!!! What a mighty, loving, and Awesome God we serve:)
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