<?xml version='1.0' encoding='UTF-8'?><?xml-stylesheet href="http://www.blogger.com/styles/atom.css" type="text/css"?><feed xmlns='http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom' xmlns:openSearch='http://a9.com/-/spec/opensearchrss/1.0/' xmlns:georss='http://www.georss.org/georss' xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2690233971923146005</id><updated>2012-01-30T11:51:44.316-06:00</updated><category term='Emotions'/><category term='Faith'/><category term='Freedom'/><category term='letting go'/><category term='forgiveness'/><category term='Trust'/><category term='strength'/><category term='Focus'/><title type='text'>heaven's journey</title><subtitle type='html'>My journey out of Egypt...into the Promised Land.</subtitle><link rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#feed' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://heavensjournies.blogspot.com/feeds/posts/default'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/2690233971923146005/posts/default?max-results=100'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://heavensjournies.blogspot.com/'/><link rel='hub' href='http://pubsubhubbub.appspot.com/'/><author><name>Heaven</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/15000637945435094609</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='32' height='24' src='http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-98J5FFR7UWM/TjbePXv_3mI/AAAAAAAAA94/rifJ4I0y_N4/s220/71698_1669402093484_1190301756_1927164_3037918_n.jpg'/></author><generator version='7.00' uri='http://www.blogger.com'>Blogger</generator><openSearch:totalResults>3</openSearch:totalResults><openSearch:startIndex>1</openSearch:startIndex><openSearch:itemsPerPage>100</openSearch:itemsPerPage><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2690233971923146005.post-7016827324600142798</id><published>2012-01-09T16:10:00.003-06:00</published><updated>2012-01-30T11:51:44.328-06:00</updated><category scheme='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#' term='Faith'/><category scheme='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#' term='Focus'/><category scheme='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#' term='strength'/><title type='text'>Got a mountain???</title><content type='html'>&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;"I think I can..."&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;"I think I can..."&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;"I think I can..."&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-KM8o7zzSZlU/TybYoxunamI/AAAAAAAABAc/kahOQbGhVWQ/s1600/aghileen-pinnacles-lefthand-valley-wilderness-area_w725_h472.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"&gt;&lt;img border="0" height="208" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-KM8o7zzSZlU/TybYoxunamI/AAAAAAAABAc/kahOQbGhVWQ/s320/aghileen-pinnacles-lefthand-valley-wilderness-area_w725_h472.jpg" width="320" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: x-large;"&gt;The little engine that could...did!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;If you're not familiar with the story of the "Little Engine that Could", it's a cute little children's story about an train engine that was trying to climb a mountain. As the mountain began to peak, the little engine began to lose strength, stamina, and energy, thus causing him to lose his confidence in his ability to make the uphill journey.&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;Depending on the version of the written story, the little engine basically tells himself he can't make the mountain. Negative thoughts begin to flood his mind and he begins to believe the lies that he isn't capable of &amp;nbsp;finishing hit journey.&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;"I'll never make it."&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;"It's too hard."&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;"I can't do this."&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;"They were right! I'm not good enough."&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;"Why do I even try?"&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;The way we think &lt;span style="font-size: large;"&gt;(and speak!)&lt;/span&gt; about ourselves does matter.&amp;nbsp;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;The way we think &lt;span style="font-size: large;"&gt;(and speak!)&lt;/span&gt; about our situations does matter.&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;The way we think &lt;span style="font-size: large;"&gt;(and speak!) &lt;/span&gt;about the people around us matters.&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;The way we think &lt;span style="font-size: large;"&gt;(and speak!)&lt;/span&gt; about our future really does matter.&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;The next time &lt;span style="font-size: x-large;"&gt;you encounter a mountain&lt;/span&gt; in the path before you,&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;and are tempted to say, "This is JUST TOO BIG!!!"...&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;I pray that you would remind your mountain&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;just &lt;b&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: x-large;"&gt;HOW BIG YOUR JESUS IS!!!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/b&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;blockquote class="tr_bq"&gt;&lt;i&gt;Jesus replied, "I tell you the truth, if you have faith and do not doubt...you can also say to this mountain, 'Go throw yourself into the sea,' and it will be done." Matthew 21:21&lt;/i&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;And when the voices and your thoughts say...&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;"I can't do this!"&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;"This is too hard!"&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;"I'll never make it!"&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;...then you remind yourself that...&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;i&gt;&lt;b&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: large;"&gt;"I can do ALL THINGS THROUGH CHRIST&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/b&gt;&lt;/i&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;i&gt;&lt;b&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: large;"&gt;&amp;nbsp;who strengthens me!!!"&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/b&gt;&lt;/i&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;i&gt;&lt;b&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: large;"&gt;Philippians 4:13&amp;nbsp;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/b&gt;&lt;/i&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;The "Little Engine that Could" finally &lt;span style="font-size: x-large;"&gt;DID&lt;/span&gt; climb that mountain!&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;He&lt;span style="font-size: x-large;"&gt; didn't &lt;/span&gt;give up! He spoke up and talked to himself!&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;He spoke to the doubts and said...&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: x-large;"&gt;"I think I can!"&lt;/span&gt; He said it more than once!!!&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;He&lt;span style="font-size: x-large;"&gt; kept going&lt;/span&gt; forward! (Despite wanting to quit!)&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;He made it!!!!!!!!&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;b&gt;and&lt;/b&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;b&gt;so&lt;/b&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;b&gt;will&lt;/b&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;b&gt;you&lt;/b&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;b&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: large;"&gt;IF&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/b&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;b&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: large;"&gt;you&amp;nbsp;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/b&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;b&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: x-large;"&gt;DO&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/b&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;b&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: x-large;"&gt;NOT&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/b&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;b&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: x-large;"&gt;QUIT!!!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/b&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;http://heavensjournies.blogspot.com/feeds/posts/default&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2690233971923146005-7016827324600142798?l=heavensjournies.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://heavensjournies.blogspot.com/feeds/7016827324600142798/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=2690233971923146005&amp;postID=7016827324600142798&amp;isPopup=true' title='2 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/2690233971923146005/posts/default/7016827324600142798'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/2690233971923146005/posts/default/7016827324600142798'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://heavensjournies.blogspot.com/2012/01/got-mountain.html' title='Got a mountain???'/><author><name>Heaven</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/15000637945435094609</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='32' height='24' src='http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-98J5FFR7UWM/TjbePXv_3mI/AAAAAAAAA94/rifJ4I0y_N4/s220/71698_1669402093484_1190301756_1927164_3037918_n.jpg'/></author><media:thumbnail xmlns:media='http://search.yahoo.com/mrss/' url='http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-KM8o7zzSZlU/TybYoxunamI/AAAAAAAABAc/kahOQbGhVWQ/s72-c/aghileen-pinnacles-lefthand-valley-wilderness-area_w725_h472.jpg' height='72' width='72'/><thr:total>2</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2690233971923146005.post-5435550510960441661</id><published>2012-01-07T16:00:00.000-06:00</published><updated>2012-01-11T14:16:50.627-06:00</updated><category scheme='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#' term='Faith'/><category scheme='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#' term='Trust'/><title type='text'>Engraved and Tattooed</title><content type='html'>&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;"See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands;&amp;nbsp;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;your walls are ever before me."&amp;nbsp;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;Isaiah 49:16 NIV&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span class="sup" id="en-NIV-en-AMP-18653" style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;"&lt;/span&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;Behold, I have indelibly imprinted (tattooed &lt;/span&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;a picture of) you on the palm of each of My hands; [O Zion] your walls are continually before Me." (Amplified)&lt;br /&gt;~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~&lt;br /&gt;"Look, I've written your names on the backs of my hands.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: left;"&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;The walls you're rebuilding are never out of my &lt;/span&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;sight."&amp;nbsp;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;(The Message)&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%; font-weight: bold;"&gt;*ENGRAVE- &lt;/span&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: center;"&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;To carve, cut, or etch a design or letters into or&lt;br /&gt;To impress deeply as if by carving or etching&lt;br /&gt;Synonym: tattooed&lt;br /&gt;~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 21px;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: large;"&gt;Have you ever gotten a tattoo?&amp;nbsp;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: large;"&gt;If not, I'm sure you know someone who has.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: large;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: large;"&gt;I know many people, including myself, who have gotten tattoos to symbolize their love for another person. I guess in a way, you could call it a "love wound". We choose to sit through the irritation/pain of a tattoo so that we have a "memorial" of a memory or a person. Years ago, I made a very spontaneous decision to get initials engraved on my body. I SOOOOOOO regret it now, as that person no longer holds that special place in my heart.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;The verses above in Isaiah speak of God's love for His people in Israel.  He wanted them to know that He wouldn't forget them because they were engraved into the palms of His hands.  The verse before speaks of a nursing mother who forgets who baby at her breast,&lt;/span&gt;&amp;nbsp;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;yet God will NEVER forget.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;In the New Testament, Jesus bore "love wounds" for us.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;This verse in Isaiah could also be true of Jesus' death and Resurrection on the cross.  Every whip that tore open His skin was because of His love for you and I.  Every drop of blood that was shed was for you and I.  Every pound of the hammer driving the nails into His hands was allowed because He loves you and I.  Every thorn that pierced Jesus' scalp was embedded for you and I.  Every breath of air He gasped for was for you and I.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;Jesus had "love wounds" for us,&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;yet He will never regret it...&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;He will never say,&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;"Oh man, why did I do that?"&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;He will never deny you...&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;or say His sacrifice was a mistake...&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;Lately, I've been worrying and having anxiety over my kids, but God brought me back to this verse.  If He loves me enough to let His only Son bear "love wounds" for me, wouldn't that mean He loves me AND my children enough to take care of us.  Isn't God still big enough in our lives to take care of the small and big circumstances around us???&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;I've always told Dylan that he can't trust and be afraid at the same time.  He has to choose to trust that God will keep him totally safe when he falls asleep, or else He chooses the believe the enemy's lies and is afraid.  Trust and fear are opposites.  He gets that and now is calling me to make the same choices.  "Mom, if you're afraid, you're not trusting..."&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;...hmmm...out of the mouths of babes...&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;Today, I choose to relinquish control of my children and place them back into the arms of my Heavenly Father who holds and can protect them better than I ever can.  I choose to trust that God is still in control and still has a plan greater than I can ever imagine.  I choose to believe that I will walk in the wisdom and counsel of God because I have the mind of Christ.  I choose to stand with the sword of the Spirit in my hand, and quit cowering with fear and doubt.  I choose to declare God's promises over myself, my children, my finances, my job, my house, our futures and God-given destinies.  I choose to remember the "love wounds" my Savior bore for me, and to keep looking forward and up!  In the name of Jesus Christ, I stand!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div style="text-align: left;"&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 130%;"&gt;~engraved in His palms~&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;http://heavensjournies.blogspot.com/feeds/posts/default&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2690233971923146005-5435550510960441661?l=heavensjournies.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://heavensjournies.blogspot.com/feeds/5435550510960441661/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=2690233971923146005&amp;postID=5435550510960441661&amp;isPopup=true' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/2690233971923146005/posts/default/5435550510960441661'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/2690233971923146005/posts/default/5435550510960441661'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://heavensjournies.blogspot.com/2009/01/see-i-have-engraved-you-on-palms-of-my.html' title='Engraved and Tattooed'/><author><name>Heaven</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/15000637945435094609</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='32' height='24' src='http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-98J5FFR7UWM/TjbePXv_3mI/AAAAAAAAA94/rifJ4I0y_N4/s220/71698_1669402093484_1190301756_1927164_3037918_n.jpg'/></author><thr:total>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2690233971923146005.post-4042812029164484382</id><published>2012-01-06T10:37:00.000-06:00</published><updated>2012-01-11T14:18:14.574-06:00</updated><category scheme='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#' term='forgiveness'/><category scheme='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#' term='Emotions'/><category scheme='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#' term='Freedom'/><category scheme='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#' term='letting go'/><title type='text'>Fight the good fight...</title><content type='html'>I spent the last week of 2011 determined to bring in the new year by letting the past be the past...once and for all. I have spent so much of my life re-living scenario after scenario of my past. Whether it be things from my childhood, or my teen years, or my mistakes, or from my marriage/divorce, I just continued to live in it.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;Everything God had shown me up until December 31, 2011, was leading me in the direction that my past had to go! &amp;nbsp;I was like a war veteran, telling the stories of the past over and over, only to keep myself stuck in that time frame of hurt, rejection, and pain. &amp;nbsp;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;Anyway, I woke up January 1, 2012, determined to go forward into all that God was calling me to. By mid-morning, I was ticked, irritated, and saying some very bad words!!! &amp;nbsp;Although my past was not repeating itself, it felt like it was through a very similar situation. I was &lt;strike&gt;ready to run someone over&lt;/strike&gt; TICKED BEYOND TICKED!!!&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;The memories of my past reared its ugly head and started taunting me.&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;"Ha! Ha! Here I am! You thought you could get rid of me! Remember this incident? And this one? Remember the pain of this one? The rage? The bitterness? The anger? The injustice? Oh, what about this? Just in case you forgot, let me remind you about..."&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;I was ready to blow!!!!! I &lt;strike&gt;had a "right" to be&lt;/strike&gt;&amp;nbsp;was angry! That person had NO right! Selfish! Jerk! &lt;strike&gt;Bad, bad, bad words!&lt;/strike&gt; Insensitive! Grrr.... I continued on and on until I eventually lost all of my peace, all of my joy, and probably a little sanity as well. &amp;nbsp;I let the offenses come and stack up so high that I couldn't even begin to think of sleep because my mind was so bombarded with junk!&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;I finally found sleep because I eventually woke up....(angry!)&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;I vented to a friend. I vented to her again. And I vented to her again. I text a different friend and said, "Um, how am I supposed to think positive about this???"&amp;nbsp;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;I did that for two or three days.&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;My heart hurt for the people involved. That caused more anger because it could have been avoided! The anger caused more hurt, more resentment, more bitterness, more anger, more hurt, more resentment.......&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;I finally cried out to God, "I'm tired of being angry and bitter. Please help me &lt;strike&gt;not hunt this person down&lt;/strike&gt;! Make good come out of this. I pray for everyone involved, even the person making the poor choices. Jesus, we need you to make this right! I need to move forward. Help me to be a light, not a jerk. Protect my kids! Protect the hearts of everyone else involved. And please move in this situation! In Jesus' name, Amen."&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;I was able to sleep last night.&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;I woke up with peace this morning.&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;I'm choosing to go forward.&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;When the next ghost from the past appears, I will choose, once again, to go forward...&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;Because I am&lt;span style="font-size: large;"&gt;&lt;b&gt;&lt;u&gt; CHOOSING&lt;/u&gt;&lt;/b&gt;&lt;/span&gt; to...&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;blockquote class="tr_bq"&gt;&lt;b&gt;&lt;i&gt;"forget what is behind and strain towards what is ahead... (I will) press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." Philippians 3:13b-14&lt;/i&gt;&lt;/b&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;http://heavensjournies.blogspot.com/feeds/posts/default&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2690233971923146005-4042812029164484382?l=heavensjournies.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://heavensjournies.blogspot.com/feeds/4042812029164484382/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=2690233971923146005&amp;postID=4042812029164484382&amp;isPopup=true' title='1 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/2690233971923146005/posts/default/4042812029164484382'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/2690233971923146005/posts/default/4042812029164484382'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://heavensjournies.blogspot.com/2012/01/fight-good-fight.html' title='Fight the good fight...'/><author><name>Heaven</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/15000637945435094609</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='32' height='24' src='http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-98J5FFR7UWM/TjbePXv_3mI/AAAAAAAAA94/rifJ4I0y_N4/s220/71698_1669402093484_1190301756_1927164_3037918_n.jpg'/></author><thr:total>1</thr:total></entry></feed>
